The Top

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Written in ink made from tears

By Popoi - 17/09/2022 17:00 - United States - Rochester

Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past six months. I have a final tomorrow and have been busy crying, so guess I'll just have to fail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 182

You deserved it 235

Happy Birthday!

By Kryoyo - 07/07/2021 20:01

Today, I held my daughter’s fifth birthday at the park. What started as a fun playdate with all her friends turned into a day of horror, when a pair of teenage boys started running around our pavillion, screaming, “Babies come from sex! Babies come from sex!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 148

Spill the T

By Seasonal Suck - 28/09/2022 16:30 - United States

Today, seasonal allergies are whooping my ass again. The last time this happened was… only two weeks ago. Even more unfortunately, today also marks the day I discovered that while hot tea does help soothe my poor, inflamed throat, if I drink too much of it without a break, I throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 216

I'm only sleeping

By Anonymous - 26/09/2022 19:30

Today, I woke up at noon after barely sleeping. I've been diagnosed with sleeping disorders, so this isn't out of the ordinary. The issue is, my boyfriend doesn't think it's a big deal, and is mad at me for wanting to stay in bed after he got up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 947

You deserved it 176

Trigger happy

By Helen - 03/08/2025 03:00 - Netherlands - Creil

Today, my boyfriend saw a notification on my phone saying "Men's Singles". He lost his shit and dumped me. It was a tennis match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524

You deserved it 103

Miscommunication

By embarrassed - 21/07/2021 10:59 - United States

Today, I saw a really cute guy in the grocery store. We made eye contact a few times and I was trying to work up the nerve to start a conversation. Instead, he screamed, "Yes, I know I’m fat, bitch. You don’t have to stare!” I got so many dirty looks I left immediately. I didn’t think he was fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 505

You deserved it 138

Comma etiquette

By Anonymous - 05/08/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I was accused of using AI to write something, all because I used the Oxford Comma ; I use it all the time, and always will. The internet has become such a total shitshow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 103

Suspicious Minds

By TM in SA - 05/02/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend left to visit her mom for the first time since Covid. I'm happy for her, the problem is I've lost a lot of weight and put on muscle since Covid, so she's terrified I'll cheat on her while she's gone, and demanded I install Net Nanny on my phone. I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 390

Whisky dick

By Anonymous - 19/08/2025 03:00 - United States - Northfield

Today, my wife was finally in the mood after 150+ attempts to seduce her and I was drunk to keep it up. Now she's upset and thinks I'm not attracted to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 169

Long haul

By Anonymous - 29/07/2021 20:01

Today, my flight from China to Moscow arrived late, making me miss my next transfer flight back home to Ireland. I had to wait for 24 hours for the next flight, without food vouchers, without a free hotel room, and without a free plane ticket that the airport was suppose to give. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 094

You deserved it 128

Better safe than sorry

By Anonymous - 21/08/2025 15:00 - Australia

Today, I thought I was going to shit myself at work. I speed-walked all the way to the bathroom clenching for dear life. Barely got my pants down while simultaneously sitting and unleashing. After all that, it was just a gigantic fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 88

Red Right Hand

By Hollerz90 - 02/04/2020 23:00

Today, I came home to find my dad in my room, watching porn on my computer. When I asked him what he was doing, he closed the computer, stood up, stared at me awkwardly and then said, "You should really avoid those sites" and left my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 259

You deserved it 215

Chronic

By sick not siiiick - 03/08/2021 00:01 - Australia

Today, after years of being unable to work because of chronic illness, I finished my second week of a new job. I'm so utterly and completely wiped out, I don't know if I can continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 974

You deserved it 157

Hey good lookin'

By Anonymous - 30/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I was doing squats at the gym. I caught my reflection in the mirror, got distracted by how awkward I looked, and lost my balance. I fell backward onto a medicine ball, rolled into another person’s legs, and took them down with me. We ended up in a sweaty heap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 284

Funny how it's never the other way around

By OnTheReceivingEnd - 29/02/2024 22:00 - United States - Mesa

Today, I got the letter from the IRS that would FINALLY enable me to get the tax return I was supposed to get two weeks ago because they needed to confirm my identity. I logged on, entered the information, and was told that I would get my return… after "up to 9 weeks for processing." I need to pay bills NOW. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 185

Having a bad day?

By Anonymous - 13/09/2025 22:00

Today, one of my dogs spilled half my coffee at home. My other dog drank the rest of it. Went to Starbucks later, picked my coffee up off the counter, and the lid popped off, spilling all over the counter, floor and my hand. While they were making me a new one, I dropped my sandwich on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 276

You deserved it 156

Average White Sox fan

By Anonymous - 12/03/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I had to explain to one of my friends that the cap he likes to wear makes people look at us funny in public. He thinks it's just the White Sox logo. It's styled like the baseball team's logo, but it actually says "Sex". I had to show him both side by side for him to see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 117

Toxic positivity

By Anonymous - 14/09/2025 22:00

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to get married after only six months because of an accidental but happy pregnancy. We’ve spent thousands on the wedding and baby stuff. Apparently it was money wasted, because I just got my period, despite not having one for three months and a positive pregnancy test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 202

Dogshit code

By Gunaditya Tripathi - 14/08/2021 10:01 - India

Today, one of my colleagues was asked to rewrite an entire project, which I wrote last week. I'd spent more than 4 days writing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 178

I can't win

By Anonymous - 08/11/2022 02:00

Today, I hate my body. If I eat anything at all, even a piece of fruit, I get terrible stomach cramps, and yet if I go too long without eating, I get gassy diarrhoea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 118

GIVE ME BOOZE, NOW!

By Anonymous - 18/08/2021 22:01

Today, I got a change of ID. My old ID had its corner cut off and was given a temporary paper ID. I went to a bar in another town to have some drinks. Turns out I couldn't because they couldn't use my old ID or my temporary one to let me drink, even though I'm 22. I've been there before and I work at my town's liquor store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 172

There is a light that sometimes goes out

By Hannah - 14/08/2021 20:01 - New Zealand - Tauranga

Today, I saw a light switch on in the hallway at school, so I tried turning it off. That was the light switch for the entire second floor. So many people saw, I turned it back on and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 938

Snot machine

By Anonymous - 07/11/2022 16:00

Today, I had to supervise my 9 year-old nephew taking a shower, because he won't wash with soap or shampoo unless someone makes him. Instead, he blows three-inch-long green and brown boogers out of his nose that dangle from his nostril. He's disgusting and hasn't even hit puberty yet. This is future of the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 177

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 13/11/2022 16:00

Today, my boss yelled at me for not being able to fix his computer. I’m not in IT, I wasn’t hired to have anything to do with IT, but he assumes that because I’m the youngest woman in the building and look like a nerd that I’m automatically a computer expert. I don’t even own my own computer at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 085

You deserved it 133

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 818

You deserved it 302

Sorry little buddy

By Sorry kitty - 23/11/2022 16:00

Today, my cat sat on me, 30 minutes before I had to go to work. When I picked him up almost immediately after he got comfortable so I could get ready, he looked and sounded absolutely crushed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 913

You deserved it 227

The Voice

By Anonymous - 06/09/2021 05:01

Today, my boyfriend took our dog to the vet because he heard him whining in pain this morning. It was actually me singing in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 297

She definitely heard

By Anonymous - 09/09/2021 02:00

Today, I had to go to the mall for a quick errand. While there one of my friends who works at a phone booth was there and I stayed for a little bit chatting with him. While chatting, a girl passed by. She was so pretty that I blurted out, "What a woman!" out loud. Turns out it was my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 268

You deserved it 1 479

Square one

By Jessica - 21/10/2025 00:00

Today, after spending last year putting in hard work, which paid off and I got my dream job, due to my own mismanagement of stress my dream job is gone and life is back at square one. Now everyone's predictions of me being a waste of space are true and I have to reinvent my life. Starting over at 38 after already starting over at 36. I can't anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 152

Parental love

By Anonymous - 15/04/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my toxic daughter learned that yelling at a biker chick won’t just get her an argument, it will get her several broken bones and a concussion. The FML is that I now have to take care of her with her broken leg for six weeks. I hate her; she’s such a bitch to everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 348

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The Top

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 112

You deserved it 4 114

Today, I was at a stop light and a bee landed on my leg. I screamed and started swatting it. It flew into my jacket and I started to strip my jacket off, taking my foot off the brake. I hit the car in front of me and deployed the air bag, breaking my nose. Then the bee stung me in the back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 669

You deserved it 15 575

Today, I'm now convinced that a series of forlorn, increasingly panicked-sounding little bird-calls are coming from the vents in my apartment. Between my social anxiety and the lockdown, I can see no way to get help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 755

You deserved it 168

Today, I got hit and totaled my new car, on my way to get married, with my fiancé and kids in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 192

You deserved it 121

Today, while I was asleep, my girlfriend squirted a tiny amount of “mild” hot sauce up my pee hole. In an area that sensitive there's no such thing as fucking mild. I’ve had two days off work already because it stings, and I cry every time I have to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 536

You deserved it 203

Today, I snapped a tendon in my knee during cowgirl position. My boyfriend was “so close to finishing” that he asked if he could just slip it back inside for a few seconds while we waited for the ambulance, “since you’re already lying down, Babe.” If I could stand, I’d have hit him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 96