Today, my girlfriend is upset with me for not wanting to sext. I can't sext with her because she adds "lol" to everything, which turns me off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my long distance boyfriend got angry because I like touching myself while we sext. It "distracts" me from him. I'm sorry you turn me on. FML
Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, all because whenever I laugh I say "lol." FML
Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Halfway through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She now won't talk to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, my girlfriend started crying because I occasionally text a work friend, for whom I have zero interest in. My girlfriend's medication has completely killed her sex drive and she no longer wants to be touched at all. She acts like hanging out with anyone is a chore. My social interaction is down to just our dogs. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was sexually frustrated. Naturally, I started coming on to her, only for her to shove me away and snap that just because she was sexually frustrated, it didn't mean that she wanted sex. Huh? FML
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Top comments
Grauncho 27
Next time you guys are having sex, start laughing out loud.
klorehore 24
My god, just tell her it's bothering you.
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Comments (126)
DayvidFML 7
Is that why you won't send anymore wiener pics lol
Thejrg4 0
You dot deserve it cus it would turn me off also. But you could try talking to her about it
edmunson 22
You sure it's not a signature programmed into her phone? At least then you could feel better about just ignoring it!
unknown2126 14
I know exactly how that feels. In ur mind ur like "really?!?!" Is there something you want to tell me
WingedApollo 12
I know the feeling. I had to stop talking to this one girl a long time ago because when we tried talking sexually online, she would say things like "spaceship" and "special na na" in place of **** or pussy.
Jarl_the_Elite 27
I'm sorry but...
Jarl_the_Elite 27
...lol
Jarl_the_Elite 27
...lol
SwtCherryPie 26
Instead of complaining to strangers on the internet, maybe talk to her about it.
fertilegod 3
you should just add your own signature-- "I'm taking off my shirt... laughing maniacally"