Today, I had decided that I was ready to have sex with my boyfriend. So, I called him and told him how naughty I felt, only to realize that I had called my dad. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML
Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said, "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw." It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parents' house and forgot his phone. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML
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Top comments
Adeptus_Astartes 22
At least he didn't say, "Who's your daddy?" in return.
DaRito 25
I still wonder how people manage to do this.
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Comments (84)
Moniquey73 13
should have waited to here him talk first.
gatorgirl7563 22
A Freudian slip is when a guy says: one thing but means [another/his mother]. This think this still counts as a Freudian slip.
aFeeble0ldMan 15
This is why you don't name your boyfriend's contact daddy.
randybryant799 21
I'm confused. Didn't you recognize your father's voice when he answered the phone???