"Who wants a dessert?" By Lewis - 27/12/2018 00:30 - France - Paris I made a huge mistake... I agree, your life sucks 296 You deserved it 89 Share Tweet Share
Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were from my mom, her Facebook account, and the Facebook account she made for her cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 824 You deserved it 3 413
Today, after months of avoiding fast food, I decided to eat some McDonald's french fries. Though the fries were delicious, they were not worth the agonizing 15 minutes I spent on the toilet afterwards. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 351 You deserved it 478
Today, I found out that when you gain too much weight, your penis can get significantly smaller. After noticing that things had been "off" in the bedroom, my girlfriend and I decided to measure it. There was significant shrinkage. I guess it's time to start working out. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 005 You deserved it 1 945
Today, I felt sick to my stomach, so I told my mother I didn't want to eat dinner. She started accusing me of being anorexic, so I ate a little bit anyway to make her stop. I then threw up, only for her to take it as confirmation that I have an eating disorder. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 362 You deserved it 2 466
Today, I had sex with a guy on our third date. We'd just finished having sex and he was blatantly on Tinder right next to me in bed. I literally hadn’t moved yet and he still had a wet boner, and yet he was on Tinder looking for his next hookup. FML I agree, your life sucks 709 You deserved it 386
Today, while at work I tripped and fell in the pool while moving a waste basket. I nearly drowned and had to be saved. I don't know which is worse the fact that I nearly drowned or the fact that I'm a lifeguard. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 727 You deserved it 13 331
you dessert it! :)
Soooo cute