Today, my boyfriend tried to use his “grief” at the death of a coworker to get butt sex, even though I know for a fact he didn’t like the guy that much, and just last week wished for the guy to get hit by a bus. Pretty despicable way to try get back door access if you ask me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband tried to use his "grief" over his grandmother's death to manipulate me into giving him a blowjob. In the toilets. During the funeral. With his family only a few yards down the hall crying their eyes out. What an asshole I married. An absolute asshole. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to use the “It’s my birthday” excuse to get access to my booty hole. Last time he used the “My favourite aunt died” excuse, and before that, the night of our fourth date, he used the “I’m drunk and can’t find the right hole” excuse. Take the hint, no means never. FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been having an intimate text exchange with a woman. She's the grieving widow of his friend who died three weeks ago. FML
Today, my husband accused me of having an incestuous relationship with my deceased father, all because we haven’t had sex in months due to my grieving. According to him, no one grieves that hard for someone unless they were in love or fucking them. FML
Today, I was mourning the recent loss of a close family member. My ex's idea of comforting me was to ask if he could come over so I could “give him some bomb ass head” to take my mind off things. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML
Today, I overheard a "friend" talking about me and my recently deceased dog. He said: "Only time I've seen someone get that upset over someone dying, they were fucking each other. Just sayin'." FML
Today, my boyfriend is leaving me for his pregnant side chick, all because I “deprived” him of sex after suffering a miscarriage. To top it all off, the smug bastard actually told me, “Don’t worry, you’ll find happiness again someday, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Seriously dude? FML
Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating again. Not wanting to lose him, I suggested we try opening our relationship and being poly. He flew into a rage and swore I was just trying to think of an excuse to get back at him by screwing a bunch of randos. I can’t win. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
It doesn’t sound like any of the nice ways to get butt sex seem to be working on you. Your boyfriend sounds like a real asshole.
smartjaguargurl 17
Pretend you think he wants you to peg him.
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Comments (25)
Cindy Lewallen Moellering 2
tell him if he lets you do it to him in the butt first then you will let him do you.
BeefyQueefy 14
...yet you still call him your bf? The same guy who casually wishes violent deaths to those he dislikes? YDI so hard
EmDizzle2007 28
the majority of the comments and stuff here are from really sensitive people...
slym12312425 9
Kick his ass to the curb and find a guy who respects you enough to straight ask for it and accept a "no" answer.
WeirdUS 30
Yeah your boyfriend is an asshole but there had to have been signs before this. Though then again if you are calling it "butt sex" I'm getting the idea both of you are pretty young. Seriously though leave him, this is a sign he will do stuff like that in the future.
Suaria 38
Tell him you will only do anal if you can peg him first. It'll probably make him stop.
created to comment 5
Not sure who prefers assholes. You or your boyfriend...
Chris Cowperthwait 4
are you giving him butt sex already or is he trying to use it to open the door? either way he's a tool I'm just curious lol
kujiens101 24
You’re boyfriend’s an asshole, but all I can think of is the song from “Dr Horrible’s Sing Along Blog” that goes “A mans gotta do what a mans gotta do”
leighmacj 11
Just tell him that if he wants it so much to let you go first, I think you’ll find he will change his mind lol