Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterwards tried to comfort me by saying there'd been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML
Today, I gave birth to my firstborn child. Somehow, my mom and mother-in-law made their way to the delivery room, and walked in mid-push. While they were escorted out, I overheard my mother-in-law asking the nurse how her son, my husband, was holding up. FML
Today, I went to the hospital to visit my aunt and her newborn baby. The receptionist gave me the room number, and I went and my aunt was in the bathroom so I cuddle the baby, only to find that the woman who came out of the bathroom was a complete stranger. I was holding her baby. FML
Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML
Today, my wife and I both got released from the hospital. She was admitted for the birth of our daughter. I was admitted with a broken arm from when my mother-in-law shoved me out of the way because she wanted to be the first one to hold the baby after my wife. FML
Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML
Today, I became one of those women who gave birth in a taxi. I used to laugh at those stories, because I couldn’t believe they would be so unprepared that they couldn’t get to the hospital first. Oh and I had to get a taxi because my husband had been watching football and was too drunk to drive. FML
Today, I had to drive the guy I've been seeing for the past few months to the emergency room. So that he could witness the birth of his newest child. FML
Today, I totaled my car whilst rushing to pick up my son from daycare. This happened as I was leaving the hospital, after dropping off a wheelchair to my recently disabled wife, who is taking care of our newborn in the special care unit. FML
Today, my wife's water broke so I drove her to the hospital. After 16 hours without labor, I went home to get a little sleep. Four hours later I got the call and ran outside to find that my car was towed from my parking space. FML
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Top comments
TehEpicBlack 20
Maybe you could continue the pattern and give birth to your next child in the cafeteria or somewhere.
HowieDoIt 21
You've got your work cut out for you to top it next time.
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Comments (98)
japtap81 16
Atleast someone was there to catch it! I was IN the room with an inexperienced nurse and luckily the bed wasnt turned into the birthing chair yet cuz my baby fell onto the bed. 8 hours in labor, on pain meds and she's watching the clock instead of the machine. She said dont push I said my body is doing the pushing. Baby fell onto the bed and I had 16 stitches.
EvilUndead 9
I'll assume that happened because they failed to receive you quickly enough. Can't you pick better hospital next time? And couldn't you pick that better hospital THIS time as well?
wvcheesehead1 9
I hope you were more choosy about where they were conceived. Congrats on the birth, as long as the baby is healthy in time you will be able to laugh at the rest.
KayleeT 9
Sorry for the horrible timing, OP but at least your babies and safe and healthy!
Kruiser 16
CHANG BABY!
_winniebell_ 10
Wow, wrong place at the wrong time.
yeongji 31
Some people give birth much faster than the average person, so if you are planning to have another child, check in to the hospital once you experience anything that makes it feel like the baby is coming soon. On the bonus side, you now have a story to tell to both your children and you do not have to spend hours waiting in labor and delivery.
nachosbabygurl 9
maybe try geting to the hospital a little sooner and that won't happen
lowshadows 21
you're halfway to a room should you decide for a third child. where was the husband anyways?!
sig4life 18
Wow, I am unsure why you even go to the hospital.