Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd been going to for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was applying Icy Hot. I squeezed the bottle too hard making it squirt in my eye. I ran to the bathroom in agony, turned on the faucet, and slammed my face right into it. FML
Today, I was having my morning coffee while getting ready for work. I grabbed clothes off the floor to throw in the hamper. I accidentally threw my full coffee instead. FML
Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML
Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML
Today, I chipped my tooth on a beer bottle. While I was drinking alone in my basement. FML
Today, due to "severe cuts to the budget" at work, I had to stir my coffee with a paperclip. FML
Today, my wife, who has a drinking problem, looked me straight in the eye as she poured herself a "water" bottle to enjoy while at work. FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML
Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to leave, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said, "Have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML
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Top comments
alphafish17 16
At least it wasn't hot tea!
iShanny 13
I could see myself doing that, it's not like you were warned the mugs were suddenly lighter. You probably weren't the only one OP!
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Comments (44)
boxergirl1054 16
Omg? just pictures this
CyanideCyan 12
I can't stop giggling like an idiot. Good job op!
mkayden 23
It sure was a refreshment
SingleLadyFTW 9
I punched myself in the face one time doing something like that. Tried to pick up a can with from what I could see only had fake flowers in it, ended up being full of pennies and my hand slipped and hit my face haha. At least it was refreshing iced tea :)
mads_fml 7
Sorry to be that guy but is "patronized" the right term for being a patron of a place for a long time?
SPN_lover666 27
Yes it is. Patronized has duel meanings. 1. Treat with an apparent kindness that betrays a feeling of superiority. 2. Fequent (a store, theater, restaurant, or other establishment) as a customer.
sincerely_eros 6
that's amazing lol LMFAO!!
vikky538 29
I wonder if anyone could have taken a video
TheLynx_fml 20
I still don't see how this would happen...
butterbunny 15
I'm sorry but I can't stop laughing
CaptainSmith28 19
I keep thinking about the episode of the Office where Jim fills Dwight's phone with nickels and then takes them out one day, making Dwight hit himself in the head