Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML
Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, I went out to where I'd parked my bike only to find that someone had stolen my bike seat. Not the bike, just the seat. I had to ride my bike two miles home in the rain like I was climbing a hill in the Tour de France, while other cyclists moved out of my way in confusion, all while trying to avoid me. FML
Today, a kind cyclist rode up next to me to inform me that my bag of groceries was about to fall off. Exceedingly careful, I slowly brought my bike to a halt. Only at the very second I stood still did I hear the dreaded "twang" as my carrier broke, and my stuff smashed to the ground. FML
Today, I was cycling home. On the way, my laces got stuck in the bicycle pedals and I couldn't move the foot that got stuck. The bicycle fell over, with me attached to it. Everyone was looking at me like, "What are you doing?" FML
Today, I was trying to be environmentally friendly by riding my BMX to work. My 'rad skills' are out of whack because I hit a pothole, fell off, and landed in a pile of trash bags that were dumped by the side of the road. The irony wasn’t lost on me. FML
Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML
Today, my friend and I were racing on our bicycles when my chain snapped. I went over the handlebars and slid, on my back, for about ten feet. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on the small bike rack they have outside the door. When I came out 5 minutes later I found someone had tied their enormous, growling German Shepard to the same rack. I had to wait for the owner to come out who then laughed at me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
StanSmith_fml 9
Don't just chain your bike to random shit.
dressedskeleton 10
An FML. Welcome to the website.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (53)
Cowgirl9999 8
I wouldn't want your bike back...horse shit doesn't come out.
perdix 31
With a name like Cowgirl + random digits, you must be an authority on horseshit. Thanks for your contribution -- FML needs more expert opinions.
ImmaB3AST 7
23- horse shit is probably the easiest shit to get out. Because all they eat is hay and stuff, it's normally sort of powdered.
perdix 31
Oh, SNAP, #23, #25 is talking shit about your knowledge of shit. He says you don't know shit about shit. Are you just going to take that shit?
mario2012 18
Shit man that sucks.
SkateboardGirl88 11
Ha!
freedomofmusic 12
Who says "whilst"?
Bigmoneyshotz 0
YDI Why would you chain your bike to the back of a vehicle wasn't there a tree or lamp post
worldclassrager 41
too bad you need now a new bike...I recommend don't bike again while still hung over...I would think the owner of the caravan would have noticed a random bike attached to it...apparently not...
Oceanlondon 5
yeehawwww! a free bike!
Arrawyn 12
Since when does hungover mean drunk?
Arrawyn 12
Oh wait, I figured it out. OP was acting as if he was drunk, with the excuse of being hungover, but in reality, it was just that they're dumb!
Warden1986 16
I'd say fyl to your bike, not you YDI.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
"Don't drive drunk" also applies to riding bikes and other things that require you to actually pay attention to what you're doing. YDI