Today, while walking through Wal-Mart I noticed a cute employee. With a sudden burst of confidence, I walked right up to him, intending to ask for his number. Instead, I looked him in the eye and said, "Excuse me sir, how much do you know about bedsheets?" and then ran. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
Today, I was walking around Walmart when this cute guy walked by me and winked. I thought he wanted to talk, so I followed him around the store, trying to catch up. Turns out it wasn't a wink, he had something in his eye. He told the security person that a weird girl was stalking him. FML
Today, I was sitting in Walmart when I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with, "You know I'm a guy, right?" FML
Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said, "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?" I said, "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?" She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML
Today, I was in Walmart with my mom. I was looking for some CDs I wanted and saw a cute guy. Then he nodded at me and as he started to walk towards me, I hear my name being called over the intercom. Apparently, according to my mom, it was time to go. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML
Today, while working as a cashier, a really cute guy came up and said, "Hi Morgan". I freaked out and asked him how he knew my name. He then replied, "You have a name tag". FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. As I was checking out, I went to grab the same item that the cashier was reaching for. He brushed my hand. He then both watched me creepily and asked my what lotion I used to make my hands so soft. When I left, he said, "I'll dream of you." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Nickb55 16
Even in the heat of the moment how did you manage to say that?
ipman737 18
Well did he take you to the bedsheets? ;)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (103)
monstermagnet 2
Better luck next time.
JennaNGood 21
Or not. OP must have interesting taste if she thinks 'hmm, here's a good looking Walmart employee, let's give him my number.' a) he works at Walmart so WHY, b) is it just me who feels that giving someone you don't know your number a little bid outdated? I mean, I would prefer to know someone before giving them my number - because they could be a complete psychopath.
Thebroskii 11
She said that she was intending to get his number. Not give hers out.
Melodija 19
Also #71 people work in places like Walmart or McDonalds while doing degrees etc not necessarily because they're stupid - his job doesn't define who he is
JennaNGood 21
That's true, although I'd prefer to meet people not at work, cause like you said it's about the person not the job - when you're intending to get someone's number while they're at work you can guarantee the outcome.
valentinov 15
#79: Your social skills are weak. Very weak. And from your comments I've gleaned quite enough in your "charming" personality. Word of advice: when you feel like giving and advice, or promoting your opinions - don't.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
Be a little more judgmental, 79. The guy has a job, which is a real feat considering the times. People that see those that work in retail/the service industry/places like Walmart as lesser than others are infuriating. Those jobs aren't the most fun and people take what they do for granted and then judge them for doing it. Grow up.
SexyQueen0905 24
You're not alone OP! I would totally do something like that.
stevothedevo 25
Ditto #1
rgearon 8
Did you ever go back to try again?
Lebeaugars95 20
ahh the old bedsheets line, you sly fox you
Nickb55 16
Even in the heat of the moment how did you manage to say that?
shaww 28
So that he would take her to the bed sheets and pick out the one that the worker likes
saba_ajira 29
Then you buy them and tell the employee to check out yours
buttcramp 21
I can relate to OP here.. I've chickened out too! The bright side is OP at least had the courage to approach and speak to him. OP will get it eventually :)
StillUsesMyspace 22
I'm sure the OP just had a bed in mind when thinking about the worker
T1A2Z3 35
It was supposed to be a line. She was going to say well... if you're a bed sheet expert maybe you'd like to come look at mine?
ipman737 18
Well did he take you to the bedsheets? ;)
rosenkrieger223 24
Dammit, I was going to say this but it would seem that you beat me to it. lol
datkenna 20
He knows enough about bedsheets to be in hers
zandalee 20
Or take you on the bed sheets?
chris_42 11
Somehow I don't think he'll ever be under those bedsheets you're buying.
ZY1431 24
well hey ya tried
Queen_bee1234 21
I wonder what his answer would have been.
ohSNAPyall 27
"Yes. I personally test every new model of sheets so that I can tell you which one feels sexiest."
Ihavegas 22
I'm going to use this a pickup line.
ericb982 8
Genius.
psiloveyou15 12
My best friend's legendary accidental pick-up line was "What's your favorite kind of bread?"
B4rn3yST1NSON 15
white Italian , why ?
vipirius 18
Wow Barney, you've really lost your touch.
Coeliacchic93 21
gluten free genius bread for me :-D
JimmyHasNoHands 7
my friends best line was, "where yo fat friends at?!"
LumpLegacy 15
went for the win and then derped
rosenkrieger223 24
I think that about sums it up.