Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML
Today, I pretended to be on the phone to avoid small talk with someone from my building. I spoke loudly into the phone while walking by them. My phone rang in the middle of my fake conversation. FML
Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML
Today, I butt-dialed my ex-boyfriend while venting to my best friend about how hot but emotionally unavailable he is. I realized this when there was a lull in the conversation and I heard his tinny little voice coming out of the phone, saying, "I can hear you." FML
Today, a guy who annoys me walked over. To avoid speaking to him, I pretended to be on the phone and he walked away. A few moments later, my phone rang. I looked around to see if he'd seen me. He had. He was the one calling me from down the hall. FML
Today, I had to go to the mall for a quick errand. While there one of my friends who works at a phone booth was there and I stayed for a little bit chatting with him. While chatting, a girl passed by. She was so pretty that I blurted out, "What a woman!" out loud. Turns out it was my ex. FML
Today, I felt left out by the fact that all my friends are getting married or have great relationships, and my boyfriend won't commit. I made a Facebook up and pretended to talk with this really cute guy I made up. Today, I found out that my boyfriend is gay when he started hitting on my made-up Facebook guy. FML
Today, I was at my cousin's house. We weren't spending time together because he was always texting. After a couple of minutes, I got jealous. I played a ringtone on my cell, and "answered" it. I had a whole conversation with nobody in an attempt to seem somewhat more popular than a 10-year-old. FML
Today, I pretended to be texting to avoid talking to an old classmate I saw at the grocery store. Unfortunately, my phone rang while I was “texting.” It was the classmate. I had no choice but to answer, while we were both standing 10 feet apart. FML
Today, while driving, I made a fake phone call with my fake boyfriend, making him sound amazing to my friends who were in the car with me. Until the red and blue flashing lights pulled up behind us. My fake boyfriend cost me $160 in real fines. FML
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Top comments
null_fml 11
Honestly... your ex is awesome. That's the best thing he could have possibly done in that situation.
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Which is why you switch the ringer off before pulling such stunts...
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Comments (122)
Hellsno 0
hahahahahhaaa.....that's what you get for giving a shit what your exboyfriend thinks.
Emperor_Jim 0
YDI, you shallow bitch. Hope all his friends got a good laugh over how immature you are.
garry24 0
why do you feel the need to tell everyone you have an iPhone? how bout "I put my PHONE up to my ear" snobby bitch, no wonder he broke up with you
breytn 0
Why does everyone write comments like this whenever someone says they're living at home and their Mom is doing something for them?! Can't you ever give them the benefit of the doubt? When my mother does laundry, she also does mine. When I do laundry I also do my Mom's, Dad's and brother's...just whatever is in the laundry basket. Might be the case here as well.
hailster17 5
Why not just call the weather number or call your voice mail? Simple way to prevent this from happening.
HookEmTexas07 0
YDI for going out of your way to point out that it was an iPhone. You aren't that ******* special because you have an iPhone. It's not even like they're hard to get. Quit being a self-important douche and maybe you'll get a boyfriend.
Gabby125 0
All you bitches whining about the OP saying iPhone don't understand. An iPhone is not just a phone, and deserves to be called by it's true name. Jealous *******, you're obviously too poor/not cool enough to have one yourself.
NumberZine 0
This jackass' message speaks for itself. Specifically, thinking owning an iPhone makes you "cool" and "rich". Sadly, most iPhone users are 16 year old boys who want to impress their high school buddies by asking for an iPhone for their birthday.
artifactoid 0
I lol at the fact that you think owning an iPhone makes you cool. And I HAD one. And guess what I called it? My PHONE, because I'm not a jackass. I got rid of it because they're heinously overpriced.
Gabby125 0
If you would please refer to the points above, you'll see that you classify as category 1: too poor
DameGreyWulf 1
Why don't you refer to their points? artifactoid DID have one, dumbass. It's a ******* phone.
misspeg 0
YDI - u should have just pretended u didn't see him even if u both caught eyes then walked past casually or just walk in2 a store. ydi cuz u caused urself more trouble than u had to.
JoeDotPadilla 0
I have read this story a hundred times. YDI. Biatch.
BlueberryPies 0
Man, what you should've done was put your cellphone on silent. That way, when your ex called, it wouldn't have rang, and then you could have glanced at your phone nonchalantly & said something to your imaginary boyfriend like, "Oh, my dumbass ex is on the other line, but screw him!"
BlueberryPies 0
P.S., all these stupid people whining about the fact that the OP said "iPhone" & not just "phone" really need to consider getting lives. A phone is a phone is a phone, whether it's an iPhone or not. You people who think that the OP's an asshole for saying "iPhone" need to grow up; & you other people giving the whiny commenters shit about "not being cool/rich enough" for an iPhone need to get a hobby.