Today, while on a first date, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I was still tired from pulling an all-nighter, and fell asleep on the toilet. When I woke up and rushed back out, my date was gone. Everyone now thinks I'm an arsehole who pulled the old "window escape" trick on her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Today, at the movies on a date, I drank all my soda and waited too long. I couldn't take it anymore and quickly got up, knocking my date's popcorn on the floor, and ran to the bathroom. I didn’t make it and went home in shame. It’s better he thinks I stood him up. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy. I lost interest in him quick, so I excused myself to go to the bathroom, hoping to make a run for the hills. As soon as I reached the front door, our server yells out, "I hope you’re not thinking about dining and dashing!" FML
Today, I had my first date in almost four years. Twenty minutes into our dinner date, I excused myself to use the ladies room. When I came back, not only was he gone, but there was also a security guard waiting to walk me out. I still have no clue why he left or why I got kicked out. FML
Today, I accidentally stood up my first date ever. How? I spent all of last night cleaning my parents' house for extra spending money to make sure the date went perfect, but I ended up sleeping through the alarm as well. FML
Today, I fell asleep for an hour in the bathroom while taking a dump. I had to convince everyone I went for a walk during lunch since no one saw my car leave. FML
Today, while on a first date with a charming guy, I excused myself to the bathroom. I tried to bring my purse along, since my pads were in there, and mother nature was calling. He vehemently insisted that I leave my purse, in case I was planning on stiffing him on the bill. FML
Today, my date from the night before let me stay behind when he had left for work. While relaxing, I figured I'd be fine to let a little fart out. Unbeknownst to me, not eating enough food over the past few days turned the contents of my bowels to liquid. I sharted on their bed. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by a friend. Everything was going great until I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Twice. My date promptly excused herself to the restroom and never came back. FML
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Top comments
Liyuesigs 8
Everyone who is irrelevant except her. Go chase after her and offer to pay her back. You might still get a second date.
XxXBadAshXxX 27
Aw man! Sad day. I'm sure you can explain what happened and she'll forgive you.
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Comments (87)
maggiefox 25
Darn these damn human bodies that sleep or don't sleep when they wish.
davincidasecond 24
Oooh, that's rough. Better luck next time buddy, just try explaining what happened and you two may just laugh about it later. :)
brandoneyez1 25
You should have rescheduled if you were so tired. You owe that girl big time assuming she gives you another chance.
alicat13 12
Apologise. Send her flowers and money for what she had to pay. That is whether or not you ask her on another date.
chloe_m12 9
Do you have her number? If so, call her and explain what happens and hopefully you'll get another chance.
buckdharma 38
First things first. Go back and flush.
cosmicriver 17
I'm sorry, man. That's totally bunk. I know how hard it can be pulling 3rd shift at work. I did it for months. It is exhausting, mentally as well as physically. Communication goes along way, although. So, just maybe, you could try explaining to her what happened and why. Also express to her that you feel absolutely terrible that you put her through that. She may have felt as if she wasn't "good enough" and in turn hurting her feelings. Although, she could be one of those women who are pissy, bitchy and high maintenance. Either way, it would not hurt to communicate to her how you feel. She may even appreciate it. Perhaps, in turn, she may tell you how she feels. You may also learn more about her character and personality by what she says. She could be forgiving, understanding and tolerant. Although, she could also be stuck-up, unforgiving, and non understanding of your work situation. I hope it all works out for you, either way. I've been there before, know how badly it can suck and it can definitely put a damper on you day, or your life in general. No matter what comes of it, just remember this ; Without The Bad Days, We Would Be Incapable Of Appreciating The Good Days. Best of luck to you.
JimmyHasNoHands 7
HOW do you fall asleep on a toilet!? at a restaurant? this it totally YDI. R/S the date if you are too tired
gracefs 11
A follow up would be great for this one! I'd really like to know what happened after.
canadiangurl13 4
if she's fun, she will probably just laugh :) its worth a try!