Today, I fell asleep for an hour in the bathroom while taking a dump. I had to convince everyone I went for a walk during lunch since no one saw my car leave. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fell asleep while taking a dump. At work. FML
Today, I got home from working 14 hours straight, went to take a dump, and fell asleep on the toilet. I woke up later on the floor, covered in shit and piss, with my alarm going off, an hour before I was due back at work. FML
Today, while on a first date, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I was still tired from pulling an all-nighter, and fell asleep on the toilet. When I woke up and rushed back out, my date was gone. Everyone now thinks I'm an arsehole who pulled the old "window escape" trick on her. FML
Today, I took a quick nap in my car during my lunch break. I'd set an alarm but forgot to turn my car off, having switched the AC on due to the blistering heat. The cool air lulled me to sleep. When I woke up, my boss was knocking on my window. Apparently, I'd knocked the car into neutral and it had rolled into his parking spot. FML
Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML
Today, at work, I thought I’d sneak a wee fart out, but ended up shitting myself. I just left work without telling anyone, went home, showered, then went back to work. No one missed me being away for 2 hours. FML
Today, I took a quick nap in my car during my lunch break. When I woke up, I had drooled all over myself and had a large wet stain on my shirt. I tried to pretend it was a "sweat stain" but ended up walking into a meeting looking like I'd been caught in a downpour of my own making. FML
Today, I was feeling tired after a work meeting, so I took a quick power nap in my office before my next meeting. When I woke up, I thought I was still in a meeting, but I had been asleep for an hour. In my panic, I tried to act cool, but I had to walk past all my coworkers, who were wondering why I looked like a zombie walking into a meeting. FML
Today, after a long work shift, I was so tired that I took a nap in my car to avoid driving half-asleep. When I awoke, there was a huge truck in front of me. I thought I'd fallen asleep while driving and was about to die. I only realized it was stationary after I pissed myself. FML
Today, I got home from work after working 16 hours straight. I was naked on the toilet, just about to get in the shower, scrolling through my phone when I nodded off and FaceTimed someone by accident. FML
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Top comments
ollie179 21
*strain* plop! ZzzZzzzzzzzzZZzzZzzzz
erazzle 0
Good poo?
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Comments (92)
erazzle 0
Good poo?
stro88 6
Damn and you didn't get an ass sore from that? Shit you must be used to being dirty.
EvilPotato 15
Or a fiesty poo that tired him out either one really.
NotAPedo 0
Must've been those boring ones since he fell asleep. You know, those dumps when you forgot your iPod or phone to entertain yourself
fatgirllovesfml 0
How could you sleep with all that smelly shit swimming under you -__-
hockey199813 5
Ha?
angeljewlz 7
Must've taken a lot out of you lol
fakeaccountX 6
Musta been mighty uncomfortable in there without a pillow.
drdingus 27
ouch
GabbyCharityM 0
Well that's a shitty situation.. Someone had to say it.
turkishjew 0
No
jondivey 9
No is right, and next time op tell the truth no one is gonna give you that much shit. Lol
EvilPotato 15
18 that was not necessary either.
NotAPedo 0
No, no one had to say that.
LouisianaBob 9
I'd just be honest about that. People won't think less of you if you're honest about embarrassing things.
13FTW 9
Well, that's a shitty situation.. (;
white16sox 19
39 are you an echo?
xXshadowrollerXx 6
53 - More than just an echo.. A flirtatious echo. I heard that's the worst kind.
Saltime 0
I swear, the next person that make a "shitty situation" pun, is in deep shit. Pun ******* intended.
13FTW 9
Sadly, I meant it as a joke to people. I didn't literally mean it. It was said it was obnoxious so I obnoxiously stated it once more.
rallets 23
ive had enough of this shit
vegan_muffin 5
...I hear that's the worst kind ;) *bats eyelashes*
Ima_monster_x3 12
Unluckaaay.
gigi03 5
I know right
decidedlyvague 11
Every kiss begins with unluc kaaaay?
StopDropNRoll 11
Ends with ^?
Quest_ 13
Wait, what?
Quest_ 13
Also may I add that I hope you enjoyed your fecal-encrusted anus after you woke up. Did it clog up like an uncapped tube of super glue?
iam_yummylicious 12
IDK why but I'm rofling so hard I can barely breath =|. Thanks for putting a smile on my face ^_^
bdair 1
WTF ?!
ollie179 21
*strain* plop! ZzzZzzzzzzzzZZzzZzzzz
Poopolicious 5
The force was so strong you got knocked out... Ehh
dreamering 16
Were you able to walk after that?
flockz 20
home:where i can poop for however long i want. thats the only thing that gets me through the day.
pinkpolarbear 8
Demotivational poster status!!
alexiiiis09 0
Shit sucks
spicywatermelon 0
Lmao. Fav.
HentaiBunny 4
What's so shameful about snoozing in your own feces? Brag about that shit, literally.