Today, while in the grocery store my boyfriend said very loudly "Don't make me hit you in public again!" He says things like this every time we are in the grocery store line. The sad part is that it's better than when he says "Are you gonna pay for the stuff you put in your purse?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of over a year looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just want to hit you." FML
Today, I found out if I refuse my boyfriend anything in public, he will continually yell out, "Penis!" until he gets his way. FML
Today, while in line at the grocery store, I was going over the witty but caustic things I wish I'd said in an argument earlier. Turns out, I was saying them out loud. The cashier gave me a weird look and said, “Are you okay, ma'am?” FML
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML
Today, my boyfriend came to my work, at a drive thru, in my car, and then got mad at me because I wouldn't give him free food. In his anger, he put my car in reverse and backed out of line very quickly, only to smash into a paying customer. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend to help me with groceries, since the last of my money went to last week's groceries. His response was to start a fight, then tell me it's my fault my daughter acts the way she does, which is when he finally got me to break down and cry. I'm pregnant with his kid, and I also pay 90% of our bills. FML
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML
Today, I was at a coffee shop with my boyfriend when we got into a little argument. I was trying to keep it calm and quiet, but my boyfriend yelled, "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE DOING THIS TO ME!" The entire coffee shop went silent. Then, an old lady yelled, “Finally, someone said it!” FML
Today, I was standing in line at the grocery store waiting for my husband. After a while, I feel him kissing my neck, so I turn to tell him that it's not appropriate in public. It wasn't my husband. FML
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Top comments
stormchaser24 24
Wow what a jerk. Dump his ass.
sydie5 12
What did you see in him again...?
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Comments (386)
hateevryone 15
and you still feel the need to be with him, why?
beccasaur57 0
Next time I go shopping with someone, I know what I'm doing.
theonlysweetpea 10
I agree with #315. Its only funny when people KNOW you're joking or in private. Reputations are how other people view you
Armygirl234 7
That's pretty funny! Until the cashier takes him seriously....
blueknight1st 26
The first joke about beating you in public isn't funny at all. However, the second joke about paying for the stuff in your purse is funny as hell and I might just have to add it to my list of jokes.
TheFunnyzach 3
I know everyone seems to want to cuss at him. But I think it's pretty funny.
StoneThaBone 0
What are you talking about that's hilarious lol
LaDeFreakinDa 4
Hey if you don't want him anymore I'll take him, he sounds funny as hell. Get a sense of humor douches. oh and bring on the thumbs down. I'm gonna shoot for -85
sparxva 12
So why haven't you dumpedhim and moved on yet?
kin3463 4
Break up with the idiot!!