Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Crossed purposes
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
Leave me alone
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Grab it while you can
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Top comments
beerab 0
That's just MEAN on your part.
mardigrasqueen 0
You are a pompous bastard. You deserved a knife, not a pencil.
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Comments (813)
lifsukssumtimes 0
why are you such a jerk? that's the most selfish thing ever
joethebiden 8
Let me get this straight, you taunted a poor and potentially mentally unstable and/or drunk person with money? You're it was just a pencil. You're lucky it was just in the leg. You're lucky to have escaped with your own life. YDI.
o_x_fml 7
You're a ******* asshole. I wish that pencil were a knife, and you got stabbed through the heart, you piece of shit.
Deftera 0
You are one of the few people on FML who actually had it coming, thinking you're all high and mighty just because you were born with a nice comfy home.
Futt_Buck 0
lol look at the ratio for this one. Almost 50 times as many people said YDI than the people who said YLIF.
zappyalex 0
I'm not a terrible person I swear, but THAT was hilarious. Nice.
shad0wpuppetz 0
1.) You're an asshole. 2.) Don't **** with homeless people, dude, they'll kick your ass.
Anawnymus 0
Good, asshole. I hope he got it in there nice and deep and broke it off inside.
LoveBuzz_fml 0
You definitely deserved that for being a douchebag.
cruncheweezy 0
Wow. I thought Douchefags like this all got their asses whooped before they were old enough to do this kinda shit? This was sad, pathetic and cruel on your part, OP. Not funny at all. Homeless people are still people. Of course, you're probably the kind of person that doesn't care about other people. At ALL.