Today, while flicking my bean, I was thinking about my boyfriend who moved to California last week. Before I came, I had to stop because I started crying. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I caught a flight to see my boyfriend, who is stationed in the army 300 miles away. When I was just 15 minutes from the base he called to say that we should break up. Now I'm heading back to California, single and broke. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me to a restaurant for lunch and said, “It’s time we talk about our future.” I got all emotional, thinking he was going to propose. Instead, he calmly told me he’s moving to another country. I cried into my breadsticks. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me in tears because the love of his life has decided to move on with another man. He is currently on his way over to cry on my shoulder about it. FML
Today, I moved to California. Too bad the rest of my belongings didn't. FML
Today, I went to see my boyfriend with the intention of breaking up with him. Instead I discovered that he lost his job today and has to move back in with his parents. I can't bring myself to dump someone who's already crying about his horrible day. Now I have to comfort my soon-to-be ex. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 months broke up with me because he is moving. He's only moving 20 minutes away. FML
Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend is moving out to California to be with a girl he met while on Chatroulette. We broke up because he thought we were moving too fast. FML
Today, I ran into my boyfriend. The same guy that told me he was still in Florida with his family. FML
Today, I saw my ex-boyfriend at Wal-Mart. This would have been fine had he not broken up with me because he was "moving to Canada." FML
Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML
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Top comments
PurpleFrostingg 7
Lol. " Flicking my bean"
actingbro 3
Who says "flicking my bean"? Lol
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Comments (286)
katybug101809 0
Ydi for using the phrase "flicking my bean"
Jos411 3
Lmfao i love that most of the comments are focused around the euphemism and not the fact that she missed her bf so much she cried while masturbating. Also, kudos on the level of determination. Not only did you break for a good cry but finished *air five*
loserman67 36
I must have read this ten times (and added it to my favorites) before replying. Your term "flicking my bean actually turns me on. I imagine you, naked, all sweaty and sexy (I trust you are very attractive) really grinding it out, then I get to the part of you crying and I really feel badly for you. If you ever get tired of "flicking your bean" and want someone who's into "Licking the bean" send me a private message. BUT, only if you are of legal age - if not, then nevermind
inloveee 0
:(
iamthefire 3
you teased your bean!
TheyCallmeStacey 9
"flicking my bean"........way to make it sound like something I'll never wanna do again.i have never heard anything like that.
RooBooBear 0
Good point, it does make it sound gross.
RooBooBear 0
Don't mix business with pleasure honey.
Nini101 2
you shouldn't be thinking about him and find someone else because long distance relationships never work.
brandiieileen 0
It's okay OP your boyfriend is probably busy crying while he is "spanking the ferret" don't worry .
Mikay617 0
Ew.