Today, while filling out some medical forms, I was asked for an emergency contact. I realized I didn't have anyone who would actually care enough to be my contact. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at hospital and the nurse asked me for an emergency contact number. I was about to say my wife, but she divorced me last month. I couldn’t think of anyone else. My parents are dead, none of my other relatives live in this country, and I have no children or friends. FML
Today, a cab driver had to sign me out of the emergency room because I didn't know who else to call. FML
Today, I got a new cell phone. I was unable to retrieve my old contact list from my old phone, so I sent out a mass email asking my friends to "Give me your contact info, unless you don't want me to text/call you!" No one is responding. FML
Today, I was so nervous about a medical exam I was about to take, that I misspelled my own first name. It only has three letters. FML
Today, I took my dog to the vet and waited in the lobby while filling out a form. The receptionist asked for his name, so I wrote it down and handed it over. She looked at the form and asked, “Is that your name or his?” I'd accidentally written my own name. FML
Today, after handing out several résumés for several jobs, I realized that I forgot to add my phone number to them. FML
Today, I wrote a post about how I was thinking of attempting suicide. Not one single person contacted me to see if I was alright. FML
Today, I made a digital contact card for my department that needed to be sent to payroll. Since we didn't have one before, I sent a copy to the rest of the department to use if they wanted. I didn't send the blank though. I sent 100s of people all of my contact info. Somehow, I managed to misspell my own name too. FML
Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML
Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. No one picked up. FML
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Top comments
the_stereotype 0
i would have just written down 911
Miso_fml 0
ill be your contact!!!! :) dont worry im not a creepy guy lol (im a girl)
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Comments (70)
gamehater777 0
aww i'd be your emergency contact any day!!!!
jchansfan 0
REJECTION HOTLINE! :D "OH NO HE'S DYING!" "CALL THE EMERGENCY CONTACT!" "Hello, this is not the person you were trying to call..." But seriously, these FMLs are lame "Today, I realized I'm a loser. FML."
poeticvibez07 0
crist I'm pretty down to earth and I'm not an outcast misunderstood maybe outcast definetly not
Cristaderzi 0
No worries Poetic much love and hugs
pleasetryagain 0
Way to feel sorry for yourself. BOO HOO.
poeticvibez07 0
lol pleasetryagain that's great
brkntooyung 0
im sorry. i know how it feels. ill be your emergency contact.
ashiiya 0
Haha about half of my friends don't pick up their phones because they don't even have calling plans, all they have are texting plans =_= I swear to god, texting is a plague.
tronner 0
Wow - what an original FML.
giganticbrain 0
Today, I realized nobody wants to talk to me because I'm an obnoxious ******* prick. Oh, and I realized my username on FML is meagainsttheworld. FML