Today, while bringing boxes up from the basement, I noticed a few spider egg sacs had stuck to my shirt. As I desperately tried to remove them, they hatched. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML
Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, some jackass spider decided to lay eggs behind my wall. No matter how many I kill, I always wake up to multiple baby spiders on my ceiling. FML
Today, when putting something away on a high shelf, something small and black fell down my cleavage. I thought nothing of it and finished the task at hand. When I pulled out the neck of my shirt later to find it and looked down, glaring up at me from my boobs was a large, disgruntled spider. FML
Today, while barbecuing, I noticed a small black baby spider crawling on my shirt. Then I felt another one crawling on the back of my neck. I still don't know if there were more than two baby spiders on me. FML
Today, I put on a pair of sneakers that I'd left outside, and went jogging. After several minutes of pain, I pulled off one of the sneakers, only to find dozens of baby spiders had moved in. FML
Today, I found out the hard way that if you leave your sheets on the washing line too long, spiders will go and make their new home in them. FML
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Top comments
devildog562 33
Arachnophobia. That truly sucks op. Time to get the flamethrowers and poison grenades.
Becca_Bear_98 19
I would've RonWeasly'd that, ran, tripped, and managed to break my arm. Butterflies, why couldn't it have been butterflies?!
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Comments (114)
vikky538 29
you are the god mother for those spicy babies..
scottyboy417 19
I would have screamed like a little girl and felt absolutely no shame. I don't mess with spiders under any circumstances.
mishwarner 14
Aaahhhh the stuff of nightmares!!!!!
trickiestboss 10
I would've had a panic attack and died on the spot.
kieralumina 30
that experience sounds horrendous. proceed with shirt burning, hot antibacterial shower, house burning, and then paranoid skin clawing.
yzzob 3
that can happen
nikkipixxqueen 8
I would've killed myself omg. I hate spiders.
NopeFuckThat 7
Sorry to say this but your house is lost
mrproboss 7
Burn it with fire!
thatonedude55 8
Oh dear god that's terrifying. KILL THEN WITH FIRE