Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, hanging out with him and his mom. I had to do a number two. A while later, we hear his mom in the washroom. She had turned on the bathtub and was flushing the toilet. A lot. Later on, my boyfriend leaves the room and she says, “Did you make that mess in the toilet?” FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML
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Top comments
Abenti 8
You just can't win. FYL
Tigerblossom 19
Just think of what would happen if you made a sandwich for him without him asking for one....
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Comments (107)
Abenti 8
You just can't win. FYL
Welshite 40
Sure you can. You rip off the toilet seat, raise it above your head, scream in victory, and then nail it to the wall above your bed as a trophy so that you will always be reminded of your triumph. You won...
wlddog 14
Or!!! Or!!!! You put cling-wrap over the toilet and put the seat down. That always gives the right image to those you love.
mrperspire 4
Some guys are just little girls. You are not in the wrong here.
stingray112 24
While I recognize the intentions were good, leaving the seat down is far more appropriate and mannerlyz
sonicgreg 12
A true saiyan always sprinkles when he tinkles.
interesting33 37
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What is a saiyan? :)
GSU2013 6
Blasphemy!
Voij 16
A sayijan is someone who's haircolor varies according to their current mood, most notabely reacting to anger, and someone who can move faster than the speed of sound, yet needs roughly 2-3 episodes to launch a single attack. Naturally and consequently, they are the strongest beings in the universe.
TorisaurusRexxx 10
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
#27, if you didn't know this, the Internet is not the place for you. I'm going to have to ask you to leave. You may return when you better educate yourself on the ways of anime.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I didn't know what a saiyan was either, 27. Some of us Internet users don't like stupid ass Asian cartoons.
Voij 16
One does not simply call the Dragonball series a "stupid ass asian cartoon"... That is unless one supports this statement with solid arguments, such as the horrible pacing, complete lack of logical reasoning and horrible localisation. (Even still, it was such an awesome show to grow up with.)
Hairnet 14
not everyone everywhere grew up with the same childhood tv-showes, you wouldn't know who Klængur Sniðugi or Völundur were and that's ok. That being said I only knew what Dragonball was from the internet ( even though I have no idea what the charters are called)
ladyLALAA 29
I'm about to go super-sane on 70!
gc327072 31
super-sayan* C'mon… I don't even like the show, but I know the right terms!
DaftDude 11
Are you all insaiyan?
SerendipityRose 26
I'm just waiting for someone to shout Kamayamaya, but take about 20 comments to get the whole word out.
KingDead 18
Dragon ball Z is the bomb!
lofty1012 3
86- it's spelt kamehameha...and that one only takes a few seconds. If you want to talk about long attacks think of spirit bombs...
RpiesSPIES 27
#98 The Father-Son Kamehameha took much longer than the others, though.
AngelSpit 18
I miss Rocko's Modern Life
xx_alexmagm_xx 12
*KA-ME-HA-ME-HA Not kameyamaya
Tigerblossom 19
Just think of what would happen if you made a sandwich for him without him asking for one....
lilhellian 27
I'd be happy to take it.. Why let a sandwhich go to waste.
QQmore_fml 18
He would be ecstatic... That's one of a mans best surprises... Unless you do something else first, then surprise him with a sandwich ;) = heaven
Voij 16
And if he were how women are described in most stereotypes, he'd be all like: "You never make any sandwiches for me... why now? OH MY GOD, are you cheating on me? Is that why you made me a sandwich!?"
mduerden 18
Little 16 year old cannot justify the mechanics of a sandwich with in the relationship aspect. Grow up
Tigerblossom 19
I was just making a joke. And don't you have something better to do than pick on a little 16 year old?
angeluv_2014 22
What does that even mean 57? I'm totally floored by how much sense your comment does not make.
Ultimate_No 7
Just put the seat down. Haven't you learned anything from South Park?
Enslaved 38
One reason that girls get upset about the toilet seat being up is, not only will our asses fall in causing our booties will touch toilet water but also many guy sprinkle their pee all along the rim and now our butt checks and thighs will be covered in your piss! Yeah, not fun!
ScruffyFML 10
At least you care enough about him to do such thing in the first place.
QQmore_fml 18
That shit kills people, you can get your insides sucked right out. Haven't you seen South Park?
Cartera 10
That episode was just flat out weird. Even for South Park standards.
klovemachine 24
Why is he so mad? It doesn't take much effort to put the seat down.
lilhellian 27
Tell that to girls who bitch about us leaving it up..
TxCountryBeauty 10
We bitch more because its gross n unsanitary. I don't want to look at it whenever I live with a guy toilet cleaning is his job.
delwoodfrashure 11
and*
SpicyDuck 22
It also doesn't take much effort to learn to aim properly! My guy has no problems and if he does he cleans it up. I never see the seat up.
BeccaHugs 17
The bathroom war is one that neither gender will ever win. Not your fault OP.
Mr_Leading 14
It seems he needs the seat down as he has a p*ssy aswell...
Catkam623 27
... What a douchebag.