Today, my two year old decided to run out the front door alone. I ran after him, tripped over the bottom of my jeans, fell onto the sidewalk and scraped up both my hands and knees. My neighbors just watched. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my 4-month-old puppy made a break for it as soon as I opened the front door. I had to run after her barefoot, in just my dressing gown. It was raining. I fell over, forgot to break my fall and skidded along the unsurfaced road. She came back on her own while I was was laid on the floor. FML
Technique
Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML
Today, I ran out of the house after my dog, tripped and knocked myself out on the railing by the front step. I woke up to my little brother lifting up the back of my dress for the neighborhood to see. FML
Today, I stepped out of the kitchen to yell at my kids for running in the house. I had just mopped the floor, and did not want them to fall. I fell while yelling and twisted my ankle. At least they know it's dangerous now. FML
Walk, don't run
Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML
Today, I went upstairs to scold my boys for running in the house because someone could get hurt. As I turned around to come back downstairs I tripped and fell all the way down to the landing at the bottom. I could hear them laughing in their rooms. FML
Chase me!
Today, my son decided to run around a supermarket in his underwear, leaving me to chase after him. FML
Today, I came home to find my little sister had decided to play hopscotch under our carport. Feeling a small childish urge, I decided to hop on one leg to the front door. I tripped and fell, slicing my knee open. FML
Today, I was showing my three year-old that going down the deck steps are perfectly safe. At the top, I tripped on my shoe and fell head first down every step. I now have five stitches and a three year old who won't go anywhere near the deck. FML
Casual
Today, I attempted a casual jog in my neighborhood. Halfway through, my shoelace snapped, and I tripped, skidding across someone’s lawn. The homeowner rushed out, not to help, but to ask why I was “attacking” their grass. FML
Top comments
blueeyes24 0
Everyone saying that she should keep her child under control... It's not like you can reason with a two year old. All kids that little misbehave sometimes and run. That doesn't make her a bad mom. And the neighbors could have assisted with the running child to make sure he didn't run into the road.
rckchlk 0
okay i posted this comment about my two year old. first of all im not fat, and im a girl. we do not live in a trailer park. and the post was suppose to be funny, he ran down our flight of stairs out the door, and when i went to grab him i tripped over my jeans and scraped myself up. im not bitching about it or even asking my neighbors for sympathy. it was a funny incident! for godsake back off. obviously a lot of you have nothing better to do than write ridiculous comments on other peoples posts.
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Comments (116)
EleventyFan 0
My advice to you: get pants that fit correctly.
sheazle 0
oh my god, you skinned your knee. your life is ruined.
Fedor_is_KING 0
Maybe it took all their energy to not laugh at the fact that your two year old just made you look like a dunce. Baby FTW
Hellooomindyy 0
5, your illiterate apparently. It says her child is two already. Smooth
mylesfrank 0
awww that sucks
ericvolp12 0
yay 1234 fml
mempholicious 0
beat dat kid azz fo running out 'head u
toto365 0
go yell at ur neighbors and take em to court for endangering a youth
Tamara2011 0
# 54 the op is a woman dumbass try reading the fml, and two what did you expect the neighbors to do for you? haha i like the other comments for that, and maybe if you kept your child under control, hopefully your kid wasn't butt naked lol.
pazzazzyyx3 3
asshole neighbors.