uterurist
Saint Paul, United States
Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Omar Khalaf
Wham!
Today, when I called my 2-year-old son over for a hug, he giggled and squealed as he ran over to me. He then stopped in front of me, punched me in the bollocks, and walked away quite happily whilst I was doubled over in pain. FML
Anonymous
Sunnyvale, United States
Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
mama bear
Fight Club Penguin
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
littlemiss
Whitby, Canada
Affectionate, huh?
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Amanda
Canada
Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML
imnotastranger
Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML
unknown
United States
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
Bratty son
Los Angeles, United States
Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML
Anonymous
United States
Fighting fit
Today, my son was getting jumped by four boys. My daughter came outta nowhere like freakin John Cena and started rag dolling those little punks. Instead of being thankful and grateful that his sister saved his ass, he decided to complain that she made him look like weak. FML
Anonymous
Morganville, United States
Not now
Today, my son took his very first steps. Unfortunately, it was during my sister's wedding. She had a full-blown bridezilla meltdown over how he "stole her spotlight". FML
Top comments
Narayan96 13
Troll child
fatkidfalling 11
Ahh, siblings and their keen interests in watching the world burn...
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Comments (32)
siggy_mcsigx 22
Well, do you?
timmeeeee 10
I think the son is trying to tell something.
A07 48
I don't think so.
PennyLane27 32
This is what nightmares are made of!!! My then 2y/o son started screaming and crying that "daddy hurt me! daddy hit me on the sidewalk!" on a busy afternoon downtown. His vocabulary was limited, so that was the best he could vocalize what was wrong. What Really happened, though, is that my husband pushed the stroller over a large bump in the uneven sidewalk ramp. My husband tripped as the stroller tipped into the curb. Son was fine, just startled. We're probably lucky all we got were horrified stares from people.
Arwen_Evenstar 37
I think you should use this to scare the hell out of him, teach him to not lie and that they have consequences. Tell him people will be taking him away because of it.
worldclassrager 41
Well then...no bruises or scars your are clear
RBW_Slave 9
Not entirely true. Child services tend to take child first, investigate later.
Smiley_70 22
Time to teach younger child to tell his brothers friends he wets the bed or wears a nappy
Mirorbo 27
That's just absolutely horrifying! Hopefully you can get this fixed up with BOTH children before it ends up getting CPS involved for a problem that doesn't even exist. And if your Son is that much of a troll already, I can only imagine the things he'd tell the CPS agents, not knowing how much trouble is actually happening. That is, assuming the son is still a young child himself.
cmchappy 25
Is the child's father satan?
iswearimhuman 12
Makes you wonder what made him do that.
Le_ponderer 14
What was taught can be un-learnt. You need to explain to your daughter that her brother did a bad thing and she is not to say those words out to anyone. Also, maybe give her teacher & his a heads-up; before this ever becomes an issue. They can testify to it being a HUGE misunderstanding.