Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML
Today, I tried to get a cup from the designated cabinet. As soon as I opened it, a glass cup fell down, which I narrowly saved from breaking by having it bounce off my foot. Obviously, that didn't feel good. But you know what also didn't feel good? The travel mug falling on my head immediately afterward. FML
Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML
Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML
Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if I wanted a Mars bar. I said that would be great and she threw one at me, catching me off guard. The Mars bar went straight into my coffee, spilling it over my bare legs. I now have a scald mark on my penis. FML
Today, I yelled, "Fuck me, oh shit!" instinctively after accidentally spilling boiling hot coffee all over myself. My 3-year-old niece found this hilarious, and won't stop saying "Fuck my shit." Her parents are due to pick her up any moment. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML
Today, I had made a cup of my favorite coffee, which I had recently found to be discontinued. To accompany this last cup, I went to get a muffin. As I turned around, I see my son pouring the cup out because I out put it next to the sink and he thought it was dirty. FML
Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML
Today, I tried to take a cool selfie with my coffee mug for Instagram. As I posed, I didn’t realize the mug was tilted, and I poured hot coffee all over myself. FML
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Top comments
derpster 7
hot crotch buns. GET IT? anyone? no? ok..
WCARlover 35
And from that day on, you were sterile
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Comments (74)
5HT2A 5
It's like you sharted....all over the front of your crotch region.
AnagenisisZagus 13
Not even. From personal experience....no.
onlychildFTW 34
Oh it can work! Just gotta slide it perfect. Or else bam. Fire crotch.
iseyixes 18
Nice, hot crotch.
lrgenesis 19
Sometimes I pee on the side of the toilet bowl because it's quieter.
1happymummy 14
Ahh kids :)
GoW_Chick 15
I've tried this so many times, it always goes bad for the person trying to grab the beverage, but in retrospect I just really like flinging hot beverages at unsuspecting people .. :)
Clamcreepy 7
I hope you didn't act like a dick or jerk towards him after that
perdix 31
Were there marshmallows in it? That could make all the scolding and blistering worth it!
Coffeebang 17
Ouch
takenover 15
Bummer, that sounds like a painful experience.