Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML
Today, I tried to get a cup from the designated cabinet. As soon as I opened it, a glass cup fell down, which I narrowly saved from breaking by having it bounce off my foot. Obviously, that didn't feel good. But you know what also didn't feel good? The travel mug falling on my head immediately afterward. FML
Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML
Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML
Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if I wanted a Mars bar. I said that would be great and she threw one at me, catching me off guard. The Mars bar went straight into my coffee, spilling it over my bare legs. I now have a scald mark on my penis. FML
Today, I yelled, "Fuck me, oh shit!" instinctively after accidentally spilling boiling hot coffee all over myself. My 3-year-old niece found this hilarious, and won't stop saying "Fuck my shit." Her parents are due to pick her up any moment. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML
Today, I had made a cup of my favorite coffee, which I had recently found to be discontinued. To accompany this last cup, I went to get a muffin. As I turned around, I see my son pouring the cup out because I out put it next to the sink and he thought it was dirty. FML
Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML
Today, I tried to take a cool selfie with my coffee mug for Instagram. As I posed, I didn’t realize the mug was tilted, and I poured hot coffee all over myself. FML
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Top comments
derpster 7
hot crotch buns. GET IT? anyone? no? ok..
WCARlover 35
And from that day on, you were sterile
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Comments (74)
JenniferTheDark 0
Ouch! Hopefully there was no severe damage done :(
MaceFaceLOL 8
Was the hot chocolate good though?
haberdasher324 0
Do you have a hot beverage as well? Sometimes it's good to just...push back.
Arxikist 3
Bye Mr. Sperm!
ilove80smetal 8
I really hope your son isn't like 20.
mrssuarez2011 12
He's a child, get over it.
Gene06 3
Sounds like a whoppin was in order.
KittyShadows 5
Ice Pack time!! xD
KiddNYC1O 22
I guess he wanted marshmallows.
Kitsune1998 0
I slide it perfectly all the time to where I want it to be