Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I realized the guy I like is not deaf. This would normally be good news. However, for the past two weeks I assumed he was deaf after seeing him use sign language. I've been openly talking about him within earshot. FML
Today, a deaf customer came to my work. In an attempt to connect with him I introduced myself in sign language. He just rolled his eyes and pointed at my name tag. FML
Desperate times, desperate, dumb measures
Today, I was so desperate for human interaction that I asked a deaf girl in my class if she liked music. I actually signed it to her. FML
Lost in translation
Today, I arranged a date with a girl online I really get along with, because frankly we both have a filthy sense of humour and love sexting. At the date, it turns out she’s deaf, which is not a problem, but she brought her sister as an interpreter. Without our usual conversation, it was just painfully awkward. FML
Foiled
Today, I was at the airport, when a lady came up and loudly asked if she could sit next to me. I have serious social issues, so to avoid having to talk to her, I pretended I was deaf and couldn't hear her. She immediately broke out her sign language skills. FML
Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML
Signing off
Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a "damn fine ass." I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML
Sign this!
Today, I was signing with my deaf brother at a local McDonald's. We were having a laugh about a game we played last night when this morbidly obese woman waddled over to us. She was utterly convinced we were "talking shit" about her and made a scene about our "hand gestures." Seriously? FML
Today, my sister told me about her upcoming trip to Mexico. I asked her how she was going to do anything without knowing any Spanish. She told me she's "just going to read their lips". FML
Today, I tried helping an old lady with her groceries. When I asked if she needed help she smiled. When I took one of her bags she yelled. I didn't know she was deaf. FML
Top comments
felixvdl 9
Sisters...... You gotta love em.
FracturedMinds 21
"So he didn't have to read lips." My guess is OP can read them too.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (89)
worldclassrager 41
Won't that be a win win?
Ipsum629 13
you should steal her boyfriend from her. she doesn't deserve a boyfriend.
fluffykittens01 7
It's like that switched at birth show One girl is deaf and the other isn't and dates deaf guys
DanielleinDC 34
When you converse with the boyfriend, you can always tell him mean and rude things about your sister--at least until she picks up the language. I know a little bit and would like to learn more, as I have a friend who is deaf.
twiztedone 19
Gotta love family! Sisters a bitch! I would teach her some phrases that will piss him off.
KMND4Life 1
How could the person tell that she proudly exclaimed it if they are also deaf?
TheLadyOpal 30
Probably from the sister's facial expression.
MuyBonita22 14
Don't feel upset OP, I'm deaf too and have the same problem
mzdaisylynn 12
I know how it is. I'm deaf too, my 18 year old brother only knows a few signs and fingerspells almost everything. When he met a cute deaf girl two years ago, he suddenly became motivated to learn ASL. They broke up, he went back to not wanting to learn. At least my parents and sister can sign.
ladytigerhunts 20
Oh thankfully my younger sister is not like yours!!
dragonkisses28 25
That is oh so wrong.