Today, my new deodorant caused an allergic reaction, covering my armpits in a painful rash. I've had to awkwardly waddle around all day with my arms splayed outwards to get any relief. One customer at work sarcastically mentioned that it's nice that they're hiring penguins these days. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had an allergic reaction to my deodorant. My armpits wouldn't stop itching, and by the time my shift was over, they were raw and bloody. FML
Today, I was getting ready for a very unpleasant doctor's appointment. I got out of the shower and used a new body spray all over my torso and arms. Turns out I'm allergic to it and now my skin is on fire, so now I get to go to an already uncomfortable appointment even more uncomfortable than I'd planned. FML
Today, I had to use anti-perspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
Today, I was going to bleach my bikini line, as I have not been able to shave there due to some ingrown hairs, and I also have to lifeguard every day. As it turns out, I'm allergic to the bleach. There is now an angry red, burning rash on my crotch that you can see around my swimsuit. FML
Today, I started my job selling perfume in a department store. I decided to be creative and sprayed a little perfume towards the first person who walked by. She had an allergic reaction, and an ambulance had to be called. FML
Today, I started my job as an assistant to a beekeeper. I forgot to put gloves on, and got stung like crazy. My hands swelled up to the size of baseball gloves. Turns out, I'm allergic to bees. FML
Today, I went to work at my new job after taking a shower but I'd forgotten to put on deodorant. I started getting strange looks and wondered why, only to find out later that everyone was talking about me, including someone I have a crush on. FML
Today, I discovered I'm allergic to the new perfume I bought and now I smell like a hospital. FML
Today, I went to the store and bought some cream to help with a sunburn I'd gotten a few days ago. What's worse than having red, peeling, and painful skin? An allergic reaction on top of it. FML
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Top comments
LaurenLo 17
I can only imagine if you worked in a restaurant... "Oh hi folks! Waddle it be today?"
scooterdude720 19
What an icy situation.
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Comments (73)
Soninuva 41
You should have responded with "at least penguins are likable, unlike you!"
Flowtastic 16
Just taking a wild guess here, are you unemployed? Edit: the real question is why is she waddling? Did she put some deodorant on her hoo-hoo as well?
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Are you telling me you're not supposed to apply Old Spice down there!? I've been using it on my taint since like, ever. I couldn't continue living life if some cute girl had to plug her nose while she was tossing my salad.. I mean, who honestly could deal with such an embarrassing situation like that!? I'll stick to using my deodorant my way until, well.. Well until I'm quite tired of getting my ass licked out!
ChevyRedneck85 13
41- I think you should have stopped it a bit earlier. It got rather disturbing pretty quickly
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Haha, yeah..I may have gone a bit too far on that one. But hey, maybe I was able to persuade just one ambitious mind to follow their dreams and take the path not many dare to walk down. I speak to the people, the people who will decide that today is the day they want to go just a little above where they have already been, an opportunity to really dig deep into ones thoughts. A place.. A place of enlightenment not just for one, but for all.
CocaColaPepsi 13
That was beautiful...
macelonel 26
dude. it's either coca cola or pepsi. choose one
scooterdude720 19
What an icy situation.
Soninuva 41
I found the customer rather cold.
domking1315 20
Im liking "icy" better than "sticky" or "shitty"
Rainhawk94 27
I'm liking giving your comments the cold shoulder
scooterdude720 19
Ouch. That was cold.
jrock9093 18
Penguins are awesome they mate for life
MrSassypants 34
#3 That implies they have nonstop sex their whole life... which isn't true, but would make someone kill to be able to do that.
scooterdude720 19
He should have said they have the same mate for life.
happyfingers 15
That is what "mate for life" means. #22 is just being a smart ass. And a bit of an idiot.
scooterdude720 19
I would argue that that's not what "mate for life" means, but I'm pretty sure everyone got the point. Number 22 was just trying to be funny by nitpicking every little word.
MrSassypants 34
#47 I find that insulting! I am more than just "a bit of an idiot". I am the whole idiot.
LaurenLo 17
I can only imagine if you worked in a restaurant... "Oh hi folks! Waddle it be today?"
shaww 28
.
Sandsh8rk 36
The customer could have a job as well!
Welshite 40
1: The customer most likely has a job of his own. 2: Insulting customers like that is the fastest way to the unemployment line. OP won't have a job for long.
gc327072 31
Take it in stride. Don your best Arnold impression and say "I PICK THINGS UP AND PUT THEN DOWN!" whilst waddling around.
hienzburgess 9
wtf?
zgomon 10
The visual is quite amusing.
juststephhere 23
Ouch that sounds painful!
M3DIC4T3 29
Why do you have your arms out so awkwardly, why not just use some soothing cream? Some aloe would probably do the trick...
Rainhawk94 27
pretty sure she can't because she's working.
M3DIC4T3 29
Well if OP works in a market they could just swipe a handful from a bottle :)... I find it so hard to believe a deodorant could cause reaction that bad... I wonder if OP shaved with a dull razor or something, and the deodorant only further irritated extreme razor burn.
AnOriginalName 19
#21 I've had deodorant cause bad enough reactions to cause me pain. It's just because I have sensitive/bad skin.
FairyTaleZombies 6
I hate to admit it, but I can't wear any deodorant due to my extremely sensitive skin. So yes, an irritation there does hurt that bad and can happen from it. Even my bathsoaps and shampoo, I have to be careful what I buy. Luckily, I'm a tiny lady that is cold natured so not too much worries about being sweaty and stinky since it has to be at least 82 degrees for me to even feel comfortable. Also, I have some nice body spray I can use that doesn't irritate my skin. :)
greeneyebeauty9 28
I suggest not using ANY deodorant until that goes away to avoid any further rashes irritating it more. sorry op. that really sucks.
M3DIC4T3 29
Use some baby powder instead... Since going without deodorant completely isn't the best idea.
hienzburgess 9
OP probably used lady speed stick. That shit BURNNNNS
Quasita 26
I feel sorry for people that can't go a day without deodorant... Not all of us require such aids to be presentable.
broderickc 13
Awkward armpit situations are the worst, sorry op