Today, my mother was reading an annual Christmas letter from an old university friend. When she remarked that she could have married him instead of my father, I replied that she wouldn't have had me then. She then said, "Exactly, I could have had his daughter instead." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my old man told me that he only married my mom because she convinced him she was pregnant with his child. In fact, she aborted a week later. "And then we had you instead." FML
Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML
Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML
Today, my mum told me she would rather spend Christmas with her boyfriend than with her own family. FML
Today, my mom said that if I wasn't her daughter, she probably wouldn't even like me. FML
Today, my parents made a list of all the things they could have done had I not been born. FML
Today, my mother was talking about a holiday she went on this time last year. She turned to me to say, "You would've loved it, it's a shame you couldn't come". I was there. It was just the two of us on holiday together. FML
Today, I asked my mother why she had me in the first place, as we never get along. She replied because my father wanted me. So, I called my father to ask him the same question, he said he only wanted to have me to keep my mother around, and that didn't work, so I was a waste. FML
Today, my mother told me to my face that if she could do it all over again, she wouldn't have had kids. Thanks, Mum. It's not like I asked to be born. FML
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Top comments
piedpiper303 29
Super bitch mom strikes again!
marcranger 29
Ah, Christmas. All about celebrating the joy that is family.
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Comments (106)
Larsh 4
I'm sure she was joking I really wouldn't take something like that at face value...
Ashley868 10
I know how you feel. My mom used to tell me that all the time when I was growing up. She wishes I had any other father but my own. It's strange because my sister's father left her but she doesn't have the same bitterness for him as she does for mine. She told my sister most of her childhood how beautiful and wonderful she is, and she spent mine telling me how ugly and stupid I was. She wonders now why I never visit her. I moved to a different city and I only visit once and a while. I get sick of hearing her insult my dad and how she hates that I look like him. He died when I was little.
Mdhughey 7
Classic troll
PunkMunk 4
Thats ****** up...
ahippienamedrae 10
You should've responded with "Yeah, then you would've gotten herpes too."
Nish007 15
maybe she was joking?
DezLovesYou 12
Your mom is definitely on Santa's bitch list this year.
RenegadeRDW 8
Lol
IXChaosDragonXI 13
That's when you say "Then maybe I would have a shot at some better genes!"
siggy_mcsigx 22
Oh wow. My mum tells me about the men who proposed to her before my Dad...she says her life would have been so different...but then she never would have had me, so no regrets :) I'm sorry, I can't imagine hearing the exact opposite...