Today, my mother-in-law came over for dinner. She decided to salt the food I was preparing without even tasting it first, then complained at dinner that I'd used too much salt. She then lectured me on the proper seasoning of food for the rest of the evening. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent all day carefully preparing a wonderful homemade beef and vegetable stew from scratch. Close to dinner time, I tasted it and it was inedibly salty. Confused, my horrifically bratty stepdaughter then laughed and admitted she poured salt in it because it wasn’t what she wanted for dinner. FML
Today, my in-laws invited us over to dinner. I decided to help out in the kitchen and watched in horror as my mother-in-law licked every utensil, sucked her fingers while making the plates and slurped wine straight from the bottle. My husband said I was rude for refusing to eat. FML
Today, at work, a woman came up to the snack bar and ordered a pretzel with no salt. When I served her the food, she angrily complained about it having no salt, followed by her throwing the whole thing in my face. FML
Today, I cooked for the future in-laws and was accused of trying to poison them. Absolutely no one told me, even as they watched me cook shrimp and smoked sausage gumbo, that my mother-in-law is deathly allergic to shellfish and my father-in-law gets severe diarrhoea when he eats pork. FML
Today, I tried to make a grilled cheese sandwich for myself, but as soon as I started, my mom rushed into the kitchen and criticized me for making it "wrong". She then made the sandwich for me. It tasted significantly worse than when I make them. FML
Today, my mother gave me a reprimand for my table manners when I didn't ask for someone to pass the vegetables I could have gotten myself. She then let out a raunchy fart at the table, and had the nerve to yell, "Did you ask to be excused?!" as I vacated the area. FML
Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML
Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML
Today, I offered to help my mother-in-law boil noodles for some noodle soup. She loudly said, "You know how!?" I'm a chef. FML
Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML
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Top comments
nyancait 18
Just so everybody knows, 'mother in law' is an anagram of 'woman Hitler'. Take from that what you will.
Vanubo 10
You could call that Verbal As-salt
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Comments (74)
grtfuldeadlovr 27
What a bitch
cchan034 23
@number 4, and you wonder why ur not married
KingLewisII 34
You wouldn't happen to have eaten a your daughter-in-laws house recently would you?
ihpp 22
reminds me of something from the show everybody loves raymond.
more4me 27
Exactly! I was thinking the same thing. Sounds like something Marie would do!
Havin 19
My thoughts exactly
EnderWolf1013 9
What a bitch.
KingLewisII 34
Wow, who put sugar in her tank? She sounds like a bitch
kevante91 8
I bet she felt so salty after that
Scynistr 20
I never cook with salt unless I have to. For this reason to. It's annoying when people larger food you prepare with stuff before tasting it. It's rude. Like saying you're not a good cook.
weveallbeenthere 30
I would have told her off
Not_Impressed13 9
Next time call her on it. Lecture her on the proper forms of not being a bitch.
Faeryl_fml 6
Remind her that too many cooks spoil the broth and next time invite her to relax, put her feet up, and let you take care of dinner.