Today, my mother and I saw a stall selling colourful treats at the shopping centre. Some were placed on small dishes, so we thought we'd sample their goods. Turns out that the colourful goodies that we'd bit into were very creative pieces of soap. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my friend's house. While she went to the kitchen, I noticed a little pink pastry on her desk. It looked really good, so I decided to take a bite before she got back. As I bit into it, a sizzling noise started, and foam overflowed in my mouth. It was a bath bomb. FML
Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML
Today, I went to visit my aunt who recently was released from an institution. She had leftover Christmas cookies so I began snacking on them. They tasted a bit off so I inquired about the ingredients. She told me they only had white icing so she used Crayola markers to give them color. FML
Today, something smelled absolutely disgusting in the bathroom. Like cow shit and stinky beetles. I started sniffing around, because whatever it was, I had to find it and clean it up. That, however, proved difficult, because it turned out that smell was coming from the new soap my mom had bought. FML
Today, my sisters and I were throwing my mom a birthday party. Since I'm not good at baking, I ordered her a really nice and expensive cake. As my daughter and I were headed out the door, she told me she had added some sprinkles to make it pretty. It was the silica beads from a package. FML
Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML
Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "How did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?" She yelled from the other room, "You know that little plate with the red stripe?" I was eating off it. FML
Today, my aunt and I wanted to do something nice. So we made cookies for a local nursing home. After tasting them, nobody ate any. FML
Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML
Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML
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Top comments
SomeRandomGuy15 18
You just randomly bit into the things on the dish without asking what they were or asking permission?
Cusefan5 6
Well at least your mouths are now clean
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Comments (100)
Cusefan5 6
Well at least your mouths are now clean
zandalee 20
Would have done me good... I have such a potty mouth.
CaptinFalconKnig 6
Well at least they aren't pretty patties where you choose a color and then become the color after eating it
soccerstar1996 18
Lets just eat whatever colorful objects we see at sketchy stalls In a mall because **** logic...
RedPillSucks 33
Well, wash out my mouth! How could you not tell the difference? If not by sight, then by smell.
anonymousguy1569_fml_fml 8
I have smelled soap that I could have sworn was a strawberry if it weren't for the label! I still tried tasting it though...
buddy51 23
They found out by that other great sense, taste!
Ameel_fml 19
Especially since it's a stall full of soap. They usually have a pretty strong soapy smell, even when you're just walking past.
sabrinaacrow 26
How did it taste?
Harpy20 24
...like soap.
sabrinaacrow 26
Well who the hell eats soap and knows what it tastes like?
thepunman 11
They did
Metallica36176 16
Well, my parents actually disciplined me when I was younger. When I cussed I got my mouth washed out with soap. It tastes....like shit.
Marcelb 17
Are we to assume you also know the taste of shit? ;)
s0m3guy2010 21
If you had a dirty mouth, why didn't you clean it up with Orbit?
sux4u121 10
Because it's all about the trident layers.
Shrouds 14
nobody pays me in layers :(
ry24 12
Getting payed in gum? Hurray welfare!
ThatPlankton 15
Not knowing how to spell "paid"! Hurray public school!
sux4u121 10
I honestly just wanted to get a comment in because it was a recent upload. It was painfully unfunny, now please do me a favor and bury my previous comment to death.
mr_sarcastic416 29
paid
NellyFC35 19
Ha!....clever I love it!
The_Honey_Badger 17
Well, unless they had something like body wash there, FYL. If it was obvious that it sold soap, YDI.
The_Honey_Badger 17
Maybe I worded that badly.
doodlecloud 27
Even if it looked like food you should be able to feel that it's not as soon as you pick it up. Soap has a very distinctive texture.
Uhscanherdarklee 10
Not necessarily, I've seen homemade dessert soaps that look and "feel" extremely edible. Don't let the name fool you though, they're just soaps in the shape of cupcakes, hard candies and such. I do have one question: who just randomly grabs something, even off a sample tray, and shoves it in their mouth without reading surrounding signs to know what it is?
Ameel_fml 19
Not just that, but who takes free samples without asking if they're free samples. I know a lot of food stores or cafes will sometimes have food on a plate at the counter, but they certainly aren't free samples.
doodlecloud 27
Really? Just, I've seen many soaps that are designed to look like food but, even when pretty convincing to look at, you could still always tell the difference when you picked them up. It's pretty hard to make soap feel like a spongey cupcake. You must have seen some pretty amazing soaps. :x
Uhscanherdarklee 10
Sorry, I guess I should have been clearer. They're obviously not believable as cupcakes, but the hard candy and other candy shaped ones could definitely fool someone. There's a lady at a market place that hand crafts them right down to the tiniest detail. I'm still not sure what purpose soap the size of candy serves.
TrueTriage 16
At least now you don't need to worry about that age old punishment of rinsing your mouth out for bad language. You did it yourself. *slow clap*
Uhscanherdarklee 10
Does that mean Op now has a couple free cuss words to use? I mean, since she's already taken the punishment...
Pleonasm 36
Hershey's "Do you Kiss your mother with that mouth? Wash it out with soap!"
SomeRandomGuy15 18
You just randomly bit into the things on the dish without asking what they were or asking permission?
RedPillSucks 33
Some stores have food samples that are there for people to try. Still, I agree with the YDI implication.
Misaki18 17
There are usually workers nearby to tell you that you can take a sample in order to avoid people taking all of the samples.
alycion 39
If there wasn't an employee nearby, I wouldn't touch the samples anyway, even if a sign said what they were. You never know when someone will find it hilarious to mess with good samples sitting out unattended. Soap was one of the better options considering.
MXACE51 2
Yeah, sea star, and seashell flavored candy is popular!
Tim2415 16
I hate it when that happens!
Catkam623 27
If only you'd sworn right before/
420Zombie 17
Goddamn, those look delicious!!