Today, my mom was giving me a long lecture about being aware of my surroundings, because you never know what's out there. While she was talking, I noticed a drug deal going down in the Walmart parking lot. She didn't notice. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Delusional
Today, my mom is 100% positive that she saw me meeting up with a stranger and buying some kind of drug from "him." I didn't even pass by anyone on my walk. I went to get dollar store pizza, because I can't afford to buy any decent food this week, let alone drugs. FML
Get a move on!
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
Today, while my mom was out, I took the car out to CVS to get some food, even though I'm not legally allowed to drive. As soon as I got back in the car, my mom pulled up 2 parking spaces away from me. She didn't notice me bend down to hide... until I accidentally hit the horn in the process. FML
Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML
Attention!
Today, I went to Walmart with my mom. At the checkout line I was eating a bag of chips as my mom bought her stuff. I inhaled while eating and I started to choke. The cashier asked me if I was OK. My mom just waved her hand, and said, "Sometimes she does that for attention, ignore her." FML
HOW VERY DARE YOU?
Today, I pooped in a drug store bathroom but forgot to flush. I left to go find my mom and found her in the toy section. I guess after I had walked away oblivious, a woman had walked into the bathroom behind me and found the kids I'd abandoned. She then came and found my mom and me, then yelled at me. FML
Kids these days, eh?
Today, my mom was driving with my brothers and sister in the back seat. She was turned around talking to us, when my sister told my mom that she missed the light. She ran it, then screamed at us about not paying attention and noticing your surroundings. FML
Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML
Today, I was in Walmart with my mom. I was looking for some CDs I wanted and saw a cute guy. Then he nodded at me and as he started to walk towards me, I hear my name being called over the intercom. Apparently, according to my mom, it was time to go. FML
Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML
Top comments
Keevarou 17
She was in the middle of a lecture.. So that's usually where the concentration goes somestimes, at least for me. But hey, she cares about you, that's a good thing anyway, an you are aware of your surroundings, so it should be fine. In worst case, just tell your mom that, then it would be ok
TatMan15 10
That's embarrassing for her. She should take her own advice
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Comments (146)
TatMan15 10
That's embarrassing for her. She should take her own advice
boating_guy 33
She's trying to help you out...even if she's a hypocrite, it's good advice. But you're already there haha so don't sweat it
RaggleFrock 13
How is she a hypocrite? they could have been stood face to face and the drug deal happened in the direction the op was facing.
nava1210 12
Being aware of your surroundings includes the things that are going on behind you too...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Mom: Be aware of your surroundings. Op: But mom, you're being mugged! Mom: nonsense. *robber casually walks away with her wallet* Mom: Well...****.
boating_guy 33
^ point and case
YoTengoTomatoes 7
Maybe op's mom is aware that she doesn't pay attention to her surroundings so she was telling op as a 'learn from my mistake' kind of advice.
nado13579 12
Well at least OP noticed and is aware of her surroundings :p
meemee47 1
Haha that's sum runny shit
meemee47 1
Funny
Keevarou 17
She was in the middle of a lecture.. So that's usually where the concentration goes somestimes, at least for me. But hey, she cares about you, that's a good thing anyway, an you are aware of your surroundings, so it should be fine. In worst case, just tell your mom that, then it would be ok
wastingtimeonFML 7
I agree!
Angitia 8
88, that's what the thumbs up button is for.
uJelly24 1
Sometimes*
Eiregal2 10
wow your feet are a work of art,beautiful
swankmrpancake 8
It's only a drug deal it's not like a shooting or a robbery that you really need to concern yourself with
SkoomaKi 28
Yeah, who cares? Just harmful and illegal substances being bought in public.
boofgall 16
It's illegal, why do you make it sound like it's as normal as trading cards?
zoPwNAgEzo 21
Because nowadays, it is.
retyi43 14
because there are never any violent disputes over drug deals
reddudeover 2
15 - Because it should be people have the right to do with their bodies what they wish. 22 - MOSTLY because it's illegal, when alcohol was illegal there were bootleggers that killed for the right to make and sell alcohol. Now that it's legal people only die from drinking it too much, or drinking and driving (or being on the receiving end).
Doxy 22
O RLY?
retyi43 14
24: I agree with you. I never said it wasn't because of prohibition
Doxy 22
That was directed at 22. And 24, I think people can do what they want with their bodies as long as no other people are concerned. They can get tattoos, eye tattoos, piercings and I'm fine with that. But not only drug use can harm your body (and there was a thread about it somewhere already), you can accidentally harm other people (eg driving while high or accidentally pushing someone of the stairs without realising).
reddudeover 2
32. That's why there are laws against operating vehicles while "impaired" whether it's by alcohol, prescription drugs or even being sleepy. Banning drugs does MUCH more harm than good and it is also needlessly expensive, as we can see the results of legalization and decriminalization in other countries.
Doxy 22
Fair enough, but like with alcohol, some people will disregard the rules. So I guess if they are there or not wouldn't really change a thing to them.
Isoldael 27
24 - main reason they want people to stay somewhat mentally sane is because the government invests in its people and wants people to work when they grow up (and I don't mean as drug dealers, but a job where people pay taxes over their income).
mhopper 13
Drugs are dangerous when gangs are involved. The selling and distribution of drugs in certain areas is what gang wars revolve around, which in turn leads to violence and murder sprees. The only drug that should be legalized is marijuana because it does serve medicinal purposes. All other drugs are extremely dangerous, whether or not they are legal.
Awes0meperson 10
48 - marajuana is legal when it comes to medical concerns. It's when people abuse it it becomes illegal
reddudeover 2
43. Like I said there are already other countries that have done this with SUCESS. There are plenty of LEGAL drug dealers they're called pharmacist and liquor stores. 48. What would be the medical benefit of smoking tobacco or drinking alcohol be again? It doesn't matter if I wish to do something dangerous with my body if I'm not hurting anyone else then leave me to it.
reddudeover 2
And the gangs being invloved in it are a direct result of it being illegal, like I said with prohibition and alcohol. You make it legal and all of a sudden people can get it legally and safely no need to go to gangs or smugglers.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Are you guys SERIOUSLY discussing the status of harmful substances in the illigal drugs category?
reddudeover 2
41. It would change a lot we wouldn't have people that haven't hurt anyone crowing the prison systems and ruining their lives. We'd have the tax money that the drugs would generate and the jobs to go along with them (producing, and helping the people that eventually get addicted) we'd get rid of the social stigma that goes along with getting help for drugs lots would change mostly having more freedom which is always good. Sorry everyone for so many and such long post.
HahaYDI 0
That sounds like something a drug dealer would say
marmlr339 14
Legalize or decriminalize all drugs. Make them available at shops. At least then the quality would be consistent. Harm reduction is much more efficient than turning drug users into criminals. Alcohol and tobacco are drugs and both are more harmful and addictive than weed, MDMA, LSD and amphetamine.
eccentrix 12
100, why would a drug dealer want drugs to be legal?
mxpklx 12
I remember my first drug deal witness. It was in the airport parking lot. Maybe ADD is a good thing. Makes you experience more stuff haha
marmlr339 14
134 - that would probably be the ridelin you take for treating ADD. Ridelin is a type of amphetamine. Amphetamines make you focus and concentrate really well. You notice little things you normally wouldnt
SaturnV 25
Harm reduction is indeed a better policy when it comes to drug users, as opposed to criminalizing them. As history has proved many times over, making something illegal won't prevent it from happening and the people who keep doing it despite its being illegal certainly won't stop because you tell them to or because it's bad for them/others. Plus, once you prohibit something, you lose the ability to regulate it.
Doxy 22
Listen to Mad Eye Moody: "Constant vigilance!"
reddudeover 2
I shame myself, but I thought that was a song, till I googled it. mad eye moody would make a good band name though.
Doxy 22
Haha it actually would. Though I'm sure someone somewhere already called dibs on the name. Rereading my comment I realised it does actually seem as though I'm promoting a band.
SliceOfCake 9
31 - that's just shameful. *hides under invisibility cloak*
Nutty4Muffs 3
Hey Doxy, did you know jellyfish mouths double as their anus? Might want to rethink your plans for reincarnation.
Doxy 22
But then again I'd be a jellyfish and not give a damn about that. I'd be too busy doing jellyfish things like bobbling around and stinging people. Maybe if I'm lucky Dory will adopt me.
reddudeover 2
Well she's right you OBVIOUSLY weren't listening to her if you had time to see a "drug" deal going down.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Apparently, the word "observant" went right over your head.
siickman 7
I think was being sarcastic bro lol
ryanLinke 4
way to go mom!
PrimeEvilTahir 24
You should've pointed it out to your mom and made her aware of the surroundings. That would've shut her up :-)
dontfmlplzzz 6
It was a test, and you passed
igive 29
you learn well, young grasshopper
CaptTeemo 10
No fair! She was distracted! You just weren't playing attention to her
br0ccoli 15
Drug deal in Walmart? Not likely. It's just the crazy coupon ladies trading the day's specials.
KaanTech 0
Well you may get banned for a 1 week or something for saying post is fake (which is....) (Not this time admin not this time!) But hell, i totally agree with you
rubberduckie94 13
Actually I worked at the Walmart bakery and as I was walking in at 3am on morning they were busting up a meth lab they were pulling out of a converted van in the parking lot.
br0ccoli 15
Rubberduckie94 - for a second there I thought you wrote that the meth lab was IN the bakery. I knew they had $5 generics, but I did not know they had meth-laced French rolls...I don't know the street price of meth, but that sounds like a deal...