Today, my mom told me she wasn't an alcoholic because she doesn't get "black out drunk" daily. She only gets drunk enough to slur her words and reek of alcohol daily, so it's okay. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mum got upset with me for having my first hangover ever after being of legal drinking age for over 6 years. She is a closet alcoholic in denial who hides red wine bottles around the house. FML
Today, my mom celebrated a year's sobriety by having a couple of beers with her boyfriend. FML
Today, I asked my mom why she drinks. She said she only drinks when she's depressed. My step-dad said she only drinks on the weekend. Those are the days I'm at her house. FML
Today, I had to pick up my drunk mom at bar. While we were driving home, she thanked me over and over again, and then said, "Thank god you have no life!" FML
Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML
Today, my once-alcoholic mom told me that she would sell me for a shot of vodka. FML
Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML
Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML
Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML
Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML
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Top comments
Crazion 26
That's what alcoholics do.
NickD6 14
Da Nile isn't just a river in Egypt
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Comments (58)
vmorgantank 15
I'm sorry
MikaykayUnicorn 36
Sorry to threadjack, but OP, please try to get your mother help. My uncle died due to his alcoholism (he was drunk and shot himself and some organ had been damaged too badly by the drinking and so he bled out, sorry I don't remember exact details it was 8 yrs ago) and my aunt has never been the same. Don't lose your mother to the horrible monster that is alcoholism.
nomoreparty 11
if she can not stop then atleast make sure she does not drive when drunk.
Crazion 26
That's what alcoholics do.
teentee401 37
I think that's the FML part
NakuEh 27
I think it might be time to lock the liquor away and lose the key.
XxDanno316xX 27
That probably won't stop her from going to the liquor store and buying more :)
Goream 8
My mother always told me she wasn't an alcoholic because she never drank a full beer/cup of wine. She would always leave like a 1/4 inch at the bottom and start a new one. "I'm not drunk, i haven't even finished one yet" her exact words to me almost daily. i feel ya.
NickD6 14
Da Nile isn't just a river in Egypt
Zebediabolical 45
Alcoholics go to meetings. She's just a run of the mill drunk.
Xamry14 10
That is false information. Alcoholism is categorized as a disease so anyone that is dependent on alcohol is an alcoholic. That's like saying a schizophrenic person isn't actually schizophrenic until they get treatment or a drug addict isn't an addict until they go to rehab. It's a ridiculous notion.
PhoenixChick 26
It was pretty clearly a joke. It's an old joke, actually, usually told among those who drink a lot.
Zebediabolical 45
*DING*DING*DING*DING*DING* WE HAVE A WINNER!
Paco_el_Taco 17
She's not an alcoholic, she's just a drinking enthusiast...
deathrise007 22
I recommend you get her to a councilor, she is going to need the help.
bonermonkey 31
denial is rough especially when its your parents.
brendejafulable 41
denial