Today, my husband lost his keys again. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went out to get groceries and ice-cream. When I got home, I couldn't find my house keys. I retraced my steps, but with no luck. I returned home and had to break in. While unpacking, I found my keys in the bag, right next to the completely melted ice cream. FML
Today, my toddler thought it would be funny to hide my car keys. After searching for hours, I found them in his toy box. FML
Today, I couldn't get to work because I couldn't find my car keys. It turns out, my mother took them and put them "somewhere safe." She can't remember where they are. FML
Today, after a week of looking for my car keys and being forced to drag my family around on public transportation, my wife found the keys in our car's ignition. FML
Today, late for work, I called my dad to see if he knew where my keys were. Turns out he'd taken them on holiday with him because they have a bottle opener on them. FML
Today, I locked my keys in my car. I had a spare key in my wallet, that I also left in the car. FML
Today, I spent an hour frantically searching for my car keys, turning the entire apartment upside down. After giving up and calling a locksmith, I found the keys… in the fridge. Because apparently I put my leftover pizza on top of them. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML
Today, as I stepped out the door and heard it lock behind me, I realized I had forgotten both my keys and my baby inside. There's no other way in. FML
Today, I was running late for an important job interview because I couldn't find my keys. I place the keys on my kitchen counter every day to prevent exactly this type of situation. After few minutes and missing my interview, I finally found my keys, in my hand. FML
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Top comments
ShadoeAcurus 16
That is... Kinda impressive actually...
Exodiafinder687 58
Well at least you will know the first place to look should the kids go missing.
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Comments (107)
theotherguyss 3
You know what they say, freezers are the perfect place to raise your kids =.
exuberant_orange 17
Write these things down, it'll make for great sitcom material later. :P
Mandybruin 15
Are you perhaps married to the absent-minded professor? Maybe try a pet first?
lilybadilly25 15
You need one of those key chains that beeps when you whistle! Or, they even have some that bark!
Purplesinger 16
Ice Ice baby
SasquatchDeluxe 10
Two words: sperm donor.
silver_belle 7
Plot twist; maybe he doesn't lose the keys... Maybe he purposely hides them so that he won't have to go anywhere.
bruhandbutercup 16
You should really invest in a "tile"
Knightchaser27 25
He would make a good children's book character
pitperson136 2
Uhhh? Honey. Where are the kids?
JayVicious 20
on ice!