Today, my girlfriend decided that having OCD will help her lose weight. She is now convinced that walking in and out of doorways multiple times will burn fat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend always assures me she doesn’t care if I’m a little overweight, yet in the past few weeks she’s bought me running shorts, new trainers, a set of professional barbells and weights, a "how to lose weight in your living room" book and installed a treadmill in the garage. FML
Today, my mother offered to give my overweight girlfriend the workout DVDs that she no longer needs. FML
Today, I walked in on my mother-in-law teaching my 11 year-old daughter how to purge herself using a toothbrush. Her logic is that, “If she gets fat, she’ll never get a boyfriend.” She sees nothing wrong, and bitched at me for messing with her future. FML
Today, my daughter expressed wanting to lose weight so I took her to a licensed dietician nutritionist to get her a healthy eating plan, and even made her an appointment with a personal trainer to get her on track. I walked in on her eating a whole box of laxatives, because "this way is faster." FML
Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML
Today, my flatmate has gotten so obese that she's breaking through the solid wood floors just by walking barefoot. She refuses to diet, and we're never getting our deposit back on this place. FML
Today, my mom once again commented on how I need to work out. It has come to the point that I now walk around in exercise clothes and have a bottle of water/fake sweat to put on, just so she thinks I work out. This is how lazy I am. FML
Today, my mother admitted to me that she sends me up and down the stairs to get things for her because she thinks I could use the exercise. FML
Today, I realized the only reason I chose to lose weight is that I can never cross the crosswalk fast enough. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that she always feels like shit, and that she's tried "everything" to feel better. Everything except eating regular healthy meals, exercising, sleeping regularly, drinking water, showering, and changing clothes daily, that is. I pointed this out, and she kicked me out in a rage. FML
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Top comments
skittlesmeep 4
Tell her sex would burn more calories.
Barr3lR0ll 9
It will, but nowhere near the amount she wants.
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Comments (133)
sataris20 5
Stress will do it faster
88vivera 9
Is she fat?
cameraman97 4
At least she is thinking positively
grudger 14
What's so bad about trying to stay in shape to look good for your mate?
wellthatsukx 0
Your girlfriend is a bitch.
ravey 0
You're girlfriend is a moron. You can't "decide" to have OCD. Tell her to do some real exercises.
friedbunnies 9
Technically, she's correct. She's burning extra calories with unnecessary movement.
infinitron 7
I guess that WOULD technically work...I stopped repressing my urge to fidget every twelve seconds and dropped a lot of weight...but she's an idiot if she thinks that you can just go about developing OCD whenever you want.
TrippingOnAcid 29
It will - more exercise
lonelygirlLynn 14
well at least she's walking XD