Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to work late. Due to delayed trains and a missed connection, it was almost midnight when I finally got home. When I walked into the bedroom, I found my girlfriend wearing sexy lingerie and fast asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend begged me to stay up late and video chat with her because she missed me. Even though I work early mornings, I reluctantly agreed. After waiting up until 2am for her to get online, I gave up. She had fallen asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while I was proposing. FML
Today, after a long 16 hour shift, I was milliseconds from sleep when my girlfriend said she "wants to talk". I'm now writing this from the couch. FML
Today, after my girlfriend had a nightmare this morning, I stayed home because she has really bad anxiety issues. A couple of hours later, she's pissed because I said I would stay up, but I fell asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriends and I had planned a movie night. When she got home, she took her laptop and some snacks we prepared, and spent the evening playing online games. When I asked if I should wait for her, she told me to go and "watch some shit on Netflix, I don't really care" without looking away from the laptop. FML
Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML
Today, I woke up to find my girlfriend not sleeping next to me. I go to my car and found a plethora of printed screenshots of me commenting things like, “So hot babe”, “Beautiful! I’d tap that” and other compliments on my female friends’ pictures on Facebook. My girlfriend’s not picking up her phone. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me at 5am, just to say how great it was that I could still sleep two more hours before leaving for work. FML
Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML
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Top comments
your_face 15
Heh... I've been on your girlfriend's side of the situation... on behalf of sleepy girlfriends everywhere, sorry about that!
sexaddict247 0
If you gave a ****, you`d be happy shes there and go cuddle wf her instead
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Comments (70)
mfreeeee 20
It takes a new level of stupidity to say that to a potential buyer.
kitkatmiaow 21
Yes!!! I keep noticing odd dates on the fmls :-/
watermelon_bae 15
At least she wasn't trying to sell you a swim suit that is too small! That wouldn't be too much fun.
pjsr 33
Yes, it's getting to be a bad habit
gosh_mate 30
If you're of a different decent, you're likely to be bigger than any of the Balinese. I remember I would always have to shop a large there, but am a size 8 here in Australia. Be comfortable with who you are! :)
curlytop101 23
What even is the grammar on this post?
waleedma 18
No the greatest sales person!!!!
saame9 11
Guy-best compliment ever Girl-biggest insult ever
nevereyes 31
What would you expect if your fat? Y'all complain when people don't make your sizes and y'all complain when they do