Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. I started to tear up and told her I had something stuck in my eye. I was secretly thrilled as I had been trying to end it for weeks. Seeing me cry, she immediately took it back. I really just had something stuck in my eye. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I slightly hesitated when she asked if she was beautiful. I am blind. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend was crying. I asked her what was wrong, and she said her husband was going to divorce her for seeing me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She came over to see me one last time. We hugged for minutes and cried; it was a touching moment. Just after she left, I realized my wallet that I had on the table beside us was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
Today, I was in bed with my girlfriend and she asked to see my phone to check my Snapchat to see what was in there. After she was done with it, she start looking into her phone to see her memories and started crying over her ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, after weeks of doubt and pondering the pros and cons, I finally broke up with my girlfriend, and she burst into tears. Feeling guilty, I tried to console her by saying, "Don't worry, we can still be cousins." FML
Today, while getting ready for a friend's wedding, I was curling my eyelashes. My cat decided to jump onto the towel rod. As I went to catch her, I ripped all the eyelashes out of one eye. I called my boyfriend crying. When he saw me, he laughed and said, "You look really surprised in that eye." FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML
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Top comments
almost_there44 26
You can't take back a breakup. Y'all both want to break up, doesn't matter who ends it. Seems like y'all with rather be in a miserable relationship than hurting each other's feelings.
manb91uk 22
Maybe you should stop being a pussy and just break up with her yourself? It should be easier now you know she doesn’t want your ass either
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Comments (20)
almost_there44 26
You can't take back a breakup. Y'all both want to break up, doesn't matter who ends it. Seems like y'all with rather be in a miserable relationship than hurting each other's feelings.
almost_there44 26
Would rather*. Never complained about anything on this app, but seeing as how y'all have went from posting almost 10 FML's a day to barely 3, it's about time. We can no longer edit comments once posted or see responses to the OP's follow-up. Why is that? There has been numerous complaints about this for almost a year and nothing has been done. Now there are barely any votes on posts and even less comments. Having an administrator come to comment once a week shows that y'all see the comments, but do not care. And yes, there are bigger things to be complaining about like the slave auction that is happening in Libya that NOBODY is mad about, so I guess this is really not the time to be complaining about this. Goodbye.
Cali 57
We do check out the comments, but we have no power on the tech side of things. I'll pass along the complaint, but for now you'll just have to proofread. I'm not sure where you got your estimate though - we've been posting 5 FMLs per day for a while now!
ffc Squall 14
Why not just tell her you want to break up?
manb91uk 22
Maybe you should stop being a pussy and just break up with her yourself? It should be easier now you know she doesn’t want your ass either
Symphoniaes 32
Do both of yourselves a favour and just break up - it’ll be easier now than later, trust me. Hope it goes well for you OP.
sweetbliss3 37
just break up now. if not, soon you'll be proposing, having kids and buying a house, while being miserable the whole time. doesn't sound like fun.
corky1992 33
Why didn’t you just tell her you wanted to break up too? You shouldn’t toy with someone’s emotions by staying with them when you don’t really want to.
GoogieWithers 25
Just tell her the truth.
RichardPencil 32
When both of you don’t want to be in a relationship with each other, there’s really only one logical next step: marriage.
R_L_Jack 11
Lol and dead wrong, but probably a lot of folks do just that.
ganlanshu777 11
well,
Storm Sternberg 10
Well that makes this easy for you. "I know you took it back when you broke up with me, but I really don't want to be in a relationship when I know you don't want to be."