Today, my dog brought me his squeaky toy to throw for him. I went to throw it down the hallway but it hit the door and bounced about a foot in front of him. He just stared at me for a minute like I was dumb, then took it to my boyfriend to throw. I disappoint even my dog. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were throwing a toy for his dog. He threw it, and I turned my head in that direction, looking for almost a minute before realizing he didn't actually throw it. He's still amused because, "even the dog was smart enough not to fall for that." FML
Today, I was arguing with my girlfriend when my dog brought me a squeaky toy and tried shoving it into my hand so I could throw it for him. Out of habit, I grabbed it, but then it squeaked every time I tried to make a serious point. FML
Today, I bought a fancy automatic ball launcher for my dog. When I demonstrated it, my dog watched the ball fly through the air, then charged at the launcher instead, thinking it was the toy. FML
Today, I was excited to teach my new puppy how to fetch. I threw the stick, and he just stared at it, then stared back at me with his tongue lolling out, as if to say, "You threw it. You go get it." I’ve now spent the past 30 minutes fetching my own stick, hoping he'd join in. Nope. FML
Today, I accidentally hit my dad in the eye with our dead dog's squeaky toy. He cried. FML
Today, I bought my dog an expensive plushie toy because I thought it would last longer than the cheap ones. He ignored it completely and spent two hours playing with the cardboard box it came in. FML
Today, I was having a conversation with a friend at the park when my dog ran up to me with something in his mouth. I thought it was a stick. I bent down to take it, only to realize it was a dead squirrel. My dog just stared at me, tongue lolling, like, “It’s a stick, throw it.” FML
Today, I walked into my apartment happy to see my dog. Instead of running to greet me, he ran straight past me to jump into the arms of my roommate, who had just walked in behind me. He wagged his tail like crazy while I stood there, rejected. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when I tripped on the leash, dropping his treat bag. He snatched one, looked at me, and ran full speed in the opposite direction. I had to chase him for three blocks, yelling his name. He thought it was a new game. FML
Today, I kicked my dog's toy snake out of my way. Then I realised my dog doesn't have a toy snake. FML
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Top comments
mareike 16
Come on, that is a bit funny :)
DeliMeat08 14
I don't think dogs can feel disappointment. They are empathetic, so maybe it just sensed you felt disappointed in yourself, and because it's a bundle of love and compassion, didn't wanna bother you anymore.
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Comments (28)
Catdragon 40
"Really? You've been playing with his balls for years and yet you can't even throw mine?"
RichardPencil 32
"Look, if you don't want to play, don't play. But if you're gonna, do it right!" Good things dogs can't talk.
jimeple 12
Omg that's so funny. You must've threw it like a girl. Know I know. Chauvinistic comment but who cares. It's funny.
BLDYRBBT 16
Apparently feminazis care
Lalala579121 28
It really wasn't. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
RinoaHeartilly 36
How is this an FML? This is pretty common and not something to be upset about.
OhPuhleeze 23
I literally laughed for a minute after reading this. Couldn't help but imagine the thing like I was standing there and the dog looking at you. Cheer up. I dont think the dog was judging you.
tjpr314 8
Lol that's funny. Just picturing and playing that scenario in my mind is hilarious . Lol
tjpr314 8
The look on your dogs face must have been priceless and the thoughts that was going on in his mind lol. Good thing he can't talk but his actions said it all. Lol Don't feel bad though it was just one of those things that just happened. He'll give you another chance.
lambda_fml 40
Dogs are smart.
LyricaSilvan 30
It's okay, OP. My dog is the same way. She'll have me throw a ball or frisbee for her, but I kinda suck at throwing. So she'll go get it, then take it to one of my family members instead. She always ends up giving me more chances to throw it for her, eventually.
NeneJPhilly 8
How do you disappoint a dog? Well I guess throwing the toy right in front of them is how... FYL