Today, my daughter told me that my head is shaped like a kidney bean and that I'm lucky she even talks to me in public. She's 6. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML
Today, a little girl came up to me and told me I looked like a foot. Thanks a bunch, darling. FML
Today, my daughter admitted to me that the only reason she's nice to me is because I give her money. She's six. FML
Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML
Today, the 6 year old girl I was babysitting asked me, "Why are you so ugly? Are you an alien? Because aliens are about as ugly as you are." FML
Today, my 7 year-old looked at me and stated, "When I grow up Mommy I want to be fat just like you." FML
Today, I told my 8 year-old daughter that she looks a lot like mommy. Now she won't come out of her room because she thinks she's ugly. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that his daughter only liked me because she thought that we look like siblings. FML
Today, I overheard my daughter compliment my mother by saying "My mom is way flabbier than you, Grandma." When I told her later that she hurt my feelings, she told me to "man up." She's seven. FML
Today, my eldest daughter told me about the sharp pains she's been having for the past couple of days. She also told me how she thinks it's really pointy carrots trying to escape her body. She's 11, and going to middle school. FML
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Top comments
ComTlancy 12
you've got to be kidney-ing me...
SophisticatedJel 0
tell her it runs in the family and that soon her head will be shaped just like yours!
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Comments (140)
woahwoahwow 9
Tell her it's what happens when you don't eat your vegetables. Your head turns into the shape of one.
gibby1235 6
yeah cause that makes so much sense
woahwoahwow 9
How many six year olds have an over developed sense of logic? Does the tooth fairy make sense? The Easter Bunny? Santa Clause?
waywil 0
Are you trying to tell us there isn't a tooth fairy, an Easter Bunny, or Santa Claus? WTF.... my whole life is a lie! What about a Leprechaun with a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow...please tell me that is real, so I have some peace of mind!
johnnybagodonuts 2
tell her she's adopted
mollylovesmac 0
Gotta love kids...
SneakherHead 5
Tell her you almost had an abortion
neonpanda44 0
who do you let her hang around with?!??
KingDingALing 9
Thabeasty01, you seriously need to shut the **** up. First off, you don't know how to use proper grammar. Second of all, you're NOT funny. Third of all, the winky faces and smiley faces don't make your arguments any stronger. Lastly, nobody is on anyone's dick. Just because nobody agrees with you doesn't mean that they're on the other person's dick. You are retarded and you need to go kill yourself, you ******* asshole.
jonnybegood_fml 0
I don't blame her, your lucky im even replying to your fml in public.
cheer_coach 0
imagine what will be coming out of her mouth at 16!
Tonyy1 0
hah good point #8!
fadingfaith 4
You know kids always say the truth....