Today, my crush asked to use my phone so he could Google something. Flattered that he wanted to use my phone, I agreed. After he was done, he handed it back with a weird look. I later realized he had found himself in my top searches. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I let a guy I like look at my phone. A second later I remembered I had a secret copy of his Facebook profile picture on there to show a friend what he looked like. I was forced to tackle him to get my phone back. FML
Today, I was interviewing a cute guy for my journalism class, and he asked to borrow my laptop to check his email quickly. After the interview, I realized that the last thing I had searched for on my browser's Google box was "ingrown pubic hairs," and it was still up there. FML
Today, a coworker and I had our second date at my place. He wanted to show me pictures of himself in some club, where he had been a member in highschool. He started typing his name into the google search bar and it suggested his name from when I had googled him months ago. FML
Today, I somehow managed to FaceTime my crush instead of texting him. I panicked, dropped my phone, then answered the call with an unflattering close-up of my forehead. FML
Today, I got my crush's phone number. I started texting him and once I told him who it was, he stopped replying. FML
Today, I spent a nice night with the guy I’ve been madly crushing on for the past year. When he went to the bathroom and left his phone unlocked, I looked at his photo album and saw photos of my house, my room, me sleeping, and my naked body. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, who I still have a major crush on. After cuddling as we watched a movie, she began to show me several pictures she had taken on her phone, and asked which ones I liked the best. She then sent the pictures I had chosen, to a guy she had met a week ago. FML
Today, my boss and I were bragging about our new phones. I unlocked mine to show its awesome display, and accidentally opened a job search app. FML
Today, my crush was giving a presentation in class. I zoned out and began staring off into space - which happened to be in the exact direction of his crotch. When I realized what I was doing, I quickly looked up at his face. He was already looking at me, with an expression of severe discomfort. FML
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Top comments
bigtime_rocker 11
One of both I'm afraid! ALWAYS CLEAR YOUR HISTORY!!!! Your life sucks, but suit yourself...
saIty 17
This is why clear history was invented. That and ****.
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Comments (68)
The_F3rris 11
Lol you creeper!
gracehi 33
Tell him you were thinking of asking him out, and googled his name to make sure he wasn't a criminal or something, because you had a bad experience on a date once. It's reasonable, near the truth, less creepy, and gives you an open to ask him out. Good luck! ;)
yoyoforpeace 14
Even of you clear Internet searches google saves some of them.
afer85 4
It happens. Flip it around, act flirty and tell him that you liked him and just wanted to learn more about him before aproaching him. He is gonna either be flattered or be beyond scared. Either way at this point you have nothing to lose.
xxGheTToGumbYxx 16
That's why you also turn of the save search option too :).
hahaholy 10
Not good, clear your history. And save yourself the embarrassment
Isa_fml 20
Embarrassing. I hate it when you let someone use your phone and remember too late that there's, uh, incriminating information on it. I let my roommate use my phone and she noticed something related to my eating disorder. She did not know that I HAD an eating disorder. It was awful. Also, I gave a different roommate my old phone when I bought a new one, and I forgot to delete the dirty text message conversations between my boyfriend and I. This is the roommate who also unpacked my box of sex toys. I TOLD him not to touch the damn box. At least he's laid-back and not a prude.
nowayisthisreal 4
You were "flattered" that he wanted to use your phone? Wtf? There is nothing flattering or flirtatious about that. How pathetic.
klx125cross 9
Why did you google your crush again? YDI
AtomicRebirth 11
Beyond that, why google them enough times that they're in your top searches?
AtomicRebirth 11
You deserve it for being a creeper.