Today, my boyfriend, who is also my boss, was giving me a blowjob at work. Halfway through, his boss knocked on the door and I had to quickly get dressed and slip out the other door. After leaving, I realized that I was still barefoot and I had to walk back to my desk in front of my colleagues. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML
Today, I sneaked off work early. As I was in the elevator on the way down to leave, it stopped at my boss's floor, and he got in. FML
Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML
Today, my boss left early, so I decided to take an extended break and run home. I found my wife in bed with my boss. I got fired for leaving work. FML
Today, I was walking to a café with my soon-to-be boss. While crossing a busy street, I slipped in a puddle and accidentally grabbed his junk to catch myself. FML
Today, I was walking through a heavy door at work, so I reached behind me to catch it so it wouldn't slam shut. Little did I know that my boss was walking through right after me. Instead of catching the door, I caught a handful of his crotch. FML
Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML
Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML
Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML
Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML
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Top comments
clair_brodie 35
I am more curious as to why you were barefoot.
ohsnapword 21
Ah the old saying still holds true. You gotta give head to get ahead.
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Comments (26)
ohsnapword 21
Ah the old saying still holds true. You gotta give head to get ahead.
julfunky 29
Well if that were the case then he’s doing it all wrong. The boyfriend was supposed to give head to someone ABOVE his pay grade.
Chris Smith_1291676952 8
Shh. Don't tell them their mistake.
Dirtysalamander1 13
not in this situation. as the boss is the one giving it.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Genius idea to get a little action at work. You were more likely to win that $1.6bn lottery jackpot than you were almost being caught by your boyboss' boss. Totally a freak occurrence for him/her to show up at some point.
clair_brodie 35
I am more curious as to why you were barefoot.
Dave_Davington 34
You know how most people store their man kebabs in their pants, yes? Well, obviously this guy's pork sword is so massive that he keeps it in his shoe.
RichardPencil 32
Sounds like an episode of the gay **** sitcom "Who's the Boss?"
manb91uk 22
Are you an avid fap - I mean fan - Mr Pencil?
engineerosaurus 26
YDI for dating your boss AND for trying to get action at work. You both should’ve been immediately fired and walked out the door.
Glowworm56 27
What weird office porno is this?
Aiden89 23
They say, never mix business with pleasure.
thomasthedankengine 11
wait... if your boyfriend was giving you a *******, are you gay? if u are a girl you would be giving him a bj
tounces7 28
I think this one is pretty obvious, don't you? I mean, unless he's REALLY driven to succeed at work.
thelittlem 15
nah he's totally straight.
Angcrad 17
He just needs to proclaim "no ****" before every sexual act
Quasita 26
You know, some of us women do also call it getting head and receiving a *******. It's just vernacular. While I'm pretty certain the poster is indeed gay, it really shouldn't matter lmao
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
Not that I've ever given a ******* to anyone, but I'm pretty sure he took his shoes off so he doesn't fold the leather on his work shoes.
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
It doesn't explain the socks though. I have no answer for that.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
"Was giving me a ******* at work" was all I had to read when I pressed YDI. Keep those acts at home.