Today, my boyfriend told me that I moan too much when we have sex. I actually just fake my moans in an effort to cover the sound of my cracking hips. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
It's all too much
Today, I told my boyfriend that I like it when he moans while we're having sex. Unfortunately, he interpreted that as "milk it". The sound is so obnoxious, it's starting to ruin the sex. FML
Acting is hard work
Today, my boyfriend told me that I needed to moan louder so that he knew I was enjoying it. Reluctantly, I put a little 'umph' into my moans during the next round. He pulled out and said, "It's just awkward now." FML
Honky
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML
Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML
Today, after faking my orgasms for several years, I found out that my boyfriend has been telling his friends that I'm super loose because he doesn't feel anything when I'm cumming. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Bedtime stories
Today, my boyfriend really gets off hearing me talk about previous sexual experiences in extreme detail while we are having sex. I have run out of real stories, so now I just make stuff up, but it's getting hard keeping track. FML
Oooooooh!
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML
Top comments
Feklfekl2222 32
I'm sure he won't mind if you explain, I know my boyfriend used to laugh at my knees clicking when I was on top, but he got over it eventually, now it's just funny. Explain to him you were a bit embarrassed by the sound and I'm sure he'll understand
itsme82 18
Maybe you should see a chiropractor. It might help. Talk to your bf op and explain about your hips. I'm sure he will be understanding.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (72)
bangbang99 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
that's terrible ;/
trollcrusher 17
Well, I suppose I'd agree that it's certainly not good to be faking during intercourse, and to have to feel that self-conscious in something that should be intimate and worry-free. OP, I hope you simply explained the noise your hips make, and if it's still too much of an embarrassment or bother, you could always play some music or find some way to cover up the noise.
thedoctor999 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I didn't know girls hips did that. I hope it doesn't hurt!
chazzywazzy654 22
Not just girls, it can happen to anyone
SPN_lover666 27
They don't unless there is something wrong with the joints.
TheLittleBear 19
Mine crack and pop all the time because the bones in my leg and hip are twisted and my hip itself is held together with steel rods. It was one of the first things I told my husband when I met him so he wouldn't be surprised by the scars. Just tell him, if he's worth anything, he'll be understanding.
Mauskau 36
My left side will click at the hip if I'm moving my leg a certain way, usually when laying down with my knee up and moving it to the left a bit. It doesn't happen all the time. Tell me oh wise one, am I broken?
Insanemf18 12
Bitch go kill the wicked witch and I'll fix your brokenness
Recon13x 9
My cereal snaps, crackles, and pops all the time.
greeneyedx 23
My pelvis often cracks in the middle. Not much of an idea why. I'm young with no kids, but I've gotten injuries from sports there before. My hips also often crack where they're connected to my legs, and it always scares my boyfriend lol. It doesn't hurt, I just feel and hear a little pop.
itsme82 18
Maybe you should see a chiropractor. It might help. Talk to your bf op and explain about your hips. I'm sure he will be understanding.
Tsukiyomi 16
You're screwed
FenHarel 9
Or not screwed depending on how he takes it.
twitwi2000 12
nobody else got that pun? okay
mottos 13
How did people not get this
Feklfekl2222 32
I'm sure he won't mind if you explain, I know my boyfriend used to laugh at my knees clicking when I was on top, but he got over it eventually, now it's just funny. Explain to him you were a bit embarrassed by the sound and I'm sure he'll understand
Cllama 10
my boyfriend doesn't even care that my knees crack, or my hips pop. I thought he would.
joshi42 16
Go see a doctor, or you end up needing replacement joints.
jadenjacksonm 14
Maybe you need to get it looked at because I know I'd loose lust if I heard my gf's hips popping with every thrust.
bonermonkey 31
pretty sure your boner isn't the primary good reason she should take care of her health
derangedplanet 23
Because all that matters is the interest of the male. -_- how much she enjoys it matters too. and her health. but yes please. clearly the problem is whether or not he likes the sound whilst having sex
johncage 14
Loose lust is a serious concern, guys. My neighbor's lust got loose once and peed all over my petunias.
rvontr88 21
Yeah... you might need to go to an Orthopedic doctor.
hipposteve 21
Ouch :(
HitmanKillsYou 13
why do your hips crack? o_o
kaed 16
Some people have loose joints and therefore those joints can be prone to cracking, but it could be for other reasons too.
wobbly1 16
maybe she's in her 70's. the very rare extreme cougar.
Colon_Man 17
I was going to say the same - except, I was going to go for 90. :D
djm2010 8
Is he pounding you too hard or is it some kind of medical thing going on there?
rileyrae0000 23
Obviously medical. Not everyone's hips crack during sex no matter how hard it is.
djm2010 8
Don't remember saying everyone's hips did that but thanks for putting the words in my text :)
Aimeejasmine 15
Sounds like someone's bitter about asking a stupid question lmao
Elban 20
He could just be a monster and it's like splitting open a chicken
djm2010 8
39, get a life