Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to break up with me but it had to be after our cruise together because he doesn't want to lose out on money. Can't wait for the Bahamas. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me to dinner. As we waited for our food he took my hand and said, "I think we should break up." When I got outside, my tire was flat. FML
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
Today, at exactly midnight, I get a text from my boyfriend saying we were done. I had just seen him 4 hours ago when we were out celebrating my birthday, and asked why he didnt just tell me then. He replies 'I couldn't break up with you on your birthday but i wanted it to be over ASAP' FML
Today, in the same sentence, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to "spend the rest of his life with me," and "I want to break up with you because I can't face your family." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me the best birthday ever, then promptly broke up with me at midnight to get back with his ex, because he "didn't want to ruin my special day." FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me. He decided he would be a gentleman and do this to me at work, over text, during a rush of unsympathetic customers, the day before our anniversary. FML
Today, it was my one year anniversary with my boyfriend. We had dinner reservations to an expensive restaurant and planned to see a movie after. At least, we did, until he called to tell me he'd volunteered to work tonight. He won't get off until 2am. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me out to a fancy dinner. Halfway through, he said he wanted to break up. I started crying, but the whole restaurant thought he'd proposed, and started clapping. FML
Today, my fiancé broke it off with me on our 3-year anniversary at 12:01 a.m. on Thanksgiving morning. Guess who gets to go to family gatherings where everyone will be asking where he is. FML
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Top comments
bonsaiboy26 1
Your boyfriend needs to be your ex boyfriend, and he needs to go to dinner alone. As for you my dear you need to hold your head high and your middle finger higher.
teague95 16
How thoughtful of him
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Comments (120)
loserman67 36
A number of posters have recommended that you go and order big ticket items and **** him over by sticking him with a huge bill, but I don't think that's such a good idea. There is no way this would be a good situatuion. You run up the bill, he gets pissed and you get hurt (possibly physically). I think you should just decline the invitation, tell him it's over and then tell him you're going to go out, find a tall handsome stranger, get your brains ****** out then start fresh again the next morning. Good Luck!
unknown_user5566 27
32- I suggested one of the screw-him-over solutions, but simply as a joke. However I'm curious how you jump from leaving the boyfriend with a big bill, to the guy abusing OP out of anger? Quite an exaggerated leap, in my opinion. The way I see it, if OP's (ex) boyfriend is going to be a douche, she may as well work it to her advantage. After all, he's the one who wanted to still go to dinner.
JurassicHole 5
34 - What 32 is saying is for OP to actually be mature and not act like a juvenile by getting some petty "revenge". The smart and right thing would be not too go. Regardless of jokes it's still hard for me to fathom the amount of immaturity people seem to have when the topic is on relationships. Running up the bill and trying to leave him with it? Sounds like just being a douche in response to a douche. It's better to be the bigger man (or woman in this case) and not go. Moving on is better than enacting some immature revenge plot just to throw salt in the other's eyes.
Quiet_one 22
OMG, 34! Everyone knows that if you even look wrong at a guy who dumped you HE WILL KILL YOU. You can never be too careful. But I do agree that it would be pretty stupid to go to dinner with this guy to run up the bill, if only because sitting through that dinner would be an absolutely miserable experience for her. Plus, if he wants to break up with her/already broke up with her, he probably won't pay for her food. Bad idea all around, but still a funny one.
mizteri 1
Free food.
skyeyez9 25
Arrive in separate vehicles. Once the waitress brings out your food, ask for a "to go bag" and leave him there. Or make sure you drive him in your car and leave him anyways....and having to find another ride home. Free food!
traveler_ghost 12
couldn't he have done it after then!?...don't even show up..what a loser
san251 10
Dump his ass let him eat alone.
ambear26 14
He does realize that he could just cancel the reservation ? What a freaken dumbass.
jelly713 19
Cancel on the dude last minute & be like "Babe, we're through. Have a good dinner!"
xxenforcerxx 4
what an ass.
sharksfan48 13
He couldn't wait until after? What a dick.
thew_fml 14
why would faking his way through the dinner and then breaking up be nicer? i do not understand this logic.
BigSexy123 11
Because expecting her to go through the dinner is even worse. He could've just broken up with her without being such a jackass.