Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said, "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw." It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parents' house and forgot his phone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML
Today, I was using my dad's cell because I had broken mine. I was texting my boyfriend all day when my dad needed his phone back. I forgot to tell my boyfriend that my dad would be using the phone. My boyfriend then texted graphically what he wanted to do to my dad. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML
Today, I had decided that I was ready to have sex with my boyfriend. So, I called him and told him how naughty I felt, only to realize that I had called my dad. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
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Top comments
Cartain 0
I think this is very much your fathers FML.
youdidwhatnow 0
FYL... dumbass
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Comments (117)
zannysmiles 0
I don't understand why you would say something like that in the first place! you definitely deserved it.
heypeoplezzz 0
I don't think you deserved it because you saw it was your boyfriends phone. Lesson well learnt :)
tayajayne 0
you have a discusting vocabulary, that's really unattractive and not a turn on to hear. get some class!
mollyjynxjax 28
First of all, the word you were trying to use to describe her vocabulary is *disgusting*. Second of all, it is her business how she talks to her boyfriend. Most people find talking dirty to be a turn on
youngcat24 0
3 are you stupid... lol im sorry but your comment made me laugh. read better next time.
alex9420_fml 0
LOOOOLL !!!!
Bivbit 3
Ydi for not making sure in the first place.. :S
BonJovi821 3
You are TEARING ME APART, LISA!
Paramorefan2 1
how ****** desperate are you?
Im_An_FML_User 0
My name's Lisa. You've disgraced my name.
SimpleGr33n 4
now he knows your just like your mom