sayhey22
Sullivan, United States
Today, my boyfriend bought a new toaster. It not only pops up the bread when done, it also beeps loudly. It makes me scream in terror every single time. My boyfriend has now vowed to "Toast 'til the end of time." It's going to be a long year. FML
Top comments
MrSassypants 34
You'll soon progress to the toast popping up into the air and you putting butter on it mid-air and catching it with a plate.
whatsittoyabitch 15
Destroy it when he sleeps.
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Comments (72)
tipsy2013 24
At least you'll be nice and toasty in the winter.
K_kanaka 26
Ba dum tss
Nickb55 16
It's not a pun if you can't relate it to the said situation, people.
BlondePsycho 43
I thought the point of this site was to laugh at others misery not relate to it.
whatsittoyabitch 15
Destroy it when he sleeps.
MrSassypants 34
Destroy it before the toaster becomes self-aware and destroys us all.
ELoni_fml 25
Maybe accidentely set it on fire?
kindasortayeah 25
Or place the toaster next to him when he sleeps, and enjoy a nice piece of toast.
foxmatrix15 8
I'd wait til he leaves the house and just toss it in the trash.
quickit 24
Crumb on! How can he be that mean?
GrimReefer66 29
Haha props to the boyfriend, you'll probably get used to it. Although, I still jump when my toast is finished.
Devindelon 17
You'll get used to it, or not.
CueTheMusic 22
How loud can a toaster be, to make you scream in terror??
sayhey22 19
It almost sounds like a broken fire alarm. It's a sketchy sound haha. I've progressed to just jumping when it happens
MrSassypants 34
You'll soon progress to the toast popping up into the air and you putting butter on it mid-air and catching it with a plate.
Ichiya 29
I suggest using a hammer to calmly beat the shit out of the toaster then lighting the broken remains on fire and finally mailing it to Mongolia.
False_Stupidity 42
Come now #23. That's not being very nice to the Mongolians.
ligerzero459 24
Give it another week and you'll barely even flinch
bryce0110 23
Apparently autistic kids don't jump to sounds like that. Guess I'm lucky to never flinch to a random loud sound :P
BananaN0se 13
HeY #23 MEEEEEEN
Johnnycake23 42
Damn Mongolians!! Stop knocking down my shitty wall!
dcb132z 17
You Relationship status now reads "single"
patrickalamo 48
Oops, it broke.
biasedshooter 24
Why would you scream?... There's no danger or need to alert others, you should learn how to be surprised and not hurt everyone elses' ears
sayhey22 19
It's a sketchy noise and he never told me it made that sound when he bought it. And his ears are just fine. However, he has begun to do this while I'm sleeping. In our room. He will pay
Exodiafinder687 58
OP must have misheard that old Battle of Bunker Hill saying: "Don't shout until you see the whites or the ryes."
JSparkz19 13
wait...he's making toast in your room? That's a whole new level of weird...
gobiteme2 34
Have you looked at the instructions ! You should be able to turn the alarm off. Final resort use a big F**king hammer
SparksTheSadie 18
Tear it down. Rip the beeper off. Close it. Enjoy.