Today, after paying a job coach a load of money for his services, pretty much the only advice he gave me was "Send out more résumés." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the job search agency that I use asked me to stop sending in my resume, as no one had hired me in three years, and that the situation was unlikely to change. FML
Today, my 16 yr old cousin needed help making a job resume so I give him mine to see as an example. He changed my name to his and it got him a job right away. The sad part? I handed my resume out to about 30 places and I am still unemployed. FML
Today, while waiting for an interview at the career that I've been spending months tailoring my résumé for, I was thrown up on by my only competitor. Guess who got the job. FML
Today, I sent out my resume to about a dozen jobs on Craigslist. I realized that I hadn't updated it in a while and went to double check it after the fact. My ex at some point had changed my objective to "I'm a cocksucker who needs a job real bad." FML
Today, being jobless and all, I tried calling my dad for a job after my many years of pride. He invited me to an interview to compete against 10 people, probably more qualified than I am. FML
Today, I sent my resumé to a former coworker to get some pointers, except that I sent it to his old work email account and now my boss knows I’m looking for a new job. FML
Today, I work in HR and last week we'd hired an apprentice for our repair shop. He was great. I spent $500 company dollars on his uniform. Later, he called me saying he had been offered a job paying $10 more an hour than what we were offering, as much as our experienced workers make. I either have to match it, or be out a helper. FML
Today, my boss told me, "You oversold your skills in your job interview." I have worked in this industry for 25 years. FML
Today, my father told me to "go get a job." He has been unemployed for three years. FML
Today, I quit my job, mainly because I didn't work enough hours and thus, earn enough money. In the past, they said there isn't any other paid work they could provide. They've now added different tasks, more money, and more hours to the position. I'm helping to find a replacement for a job I would otherwise apply to. FML
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Top comments
cocacola999 27
Alternatively: become a job coach. Seems like an easy job.
crimsonprodigy 15
So he's basically a guy that looks over resumes and gives obvious advice. Sounds like an easy career, sign me up.
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Comments (39)
comedybreak 20
That may be because everything else is on point, OP
khaoticpanda 28
Haha yeah lets hope we get a follow up from OP soon saying he got a job
gobiteme2 34
*she*
howard007 18
She did her job though, not a very well and critical advice, but she technically did it correctly lol
BntyHntrSeattle 30
I think he should coach himself at his own job before he wastes others' money and time.
emile_heskey 11
That's two things in here that WONT WORK
johobus28 26
When I need a JOB done, I call someone whose JOB it is to do that JOB!
Nolimit2217 32
Money well spent!
cocacola999 27
Alternatively: become a job coach. Seems like an easy job.
Joshwarrior 39
Damn best me to it lol i second this. Op just keep trying I graduated in may and it took me a few months to get a job still not in my field but decent.
Joshwarrior 39
Beat me to it *
MrConcise 35
OP as a job coach: "My advice to get a job is make one up. It's so easy that even I did it! You see that degree on the wall? My kid drew it in art class this morning, and yet you paid me to direct your professional life."
crimsonprodigy 15
So he's basically a guy that looks over resumes and gives obvious advice. Sounds like an easy career, sign me up.
NamelessFace 22
Like Captain Hindsight!
patrickalamo 48
You need a life coach next.... Remember to breath...
RyWillieMitch 16
Guess who needs a spelling coach
badmandilon 19
Lesson learned: next time get free advice from good internet sites and keep the money for yourself. Sorry OP.
15Erik 21
You need experience to get a job; you need a job to get experience.
HJKM_fml 19
And that is why they have internships. It's basically free labour for the company (except in the rare instances where they're nice enough to pay you) and you get experience. The only other real option is getting a part time job where you don't really need experience like a cashier. Stay for a couple of years. You may move up within that company or get a job elsewhere now that you have experience. Best of luck with your job search OP.
15Erik 21
Uhm, I think you searched to deep into a rather common statement.
lvg_fml 10
I would talk to him and tell him to give you some of the money back. Bad referrals are bad for business