Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML
Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently, my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she's embarrassed of my real brother. FML
Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML
Today, my parents met my boyfriend, and to say it went badly is an understatement. My mom went outside to relax by chain smoking and the shouting, and the screaming only ended when my dad took my boyfriend by the scruff of the neck and threw him out the front door into the street. FML
Today, my mother stormed into my room shouting about how I never go anywhere and then tells me to go out "NOW" and do something. As she is pushing me out the door, her boyfriend walks in. FML
Today, my boyfriends mom walked in on us having sex. She is partially blind so she couldn’t tell what was going on. She had a full conversation while he was still inside me. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my mom and started acting strange. Then my dad came in and was instantly furious. Apparently, my boyfriend is the guy my mom cheated with that caused my parent's divorce. He’s 3 years younger than I am. Gross mom, just gross. Also I’m single again, damn it. FML
Today, I fell asleep at my boyfriend’s house and missed my curfew. It’s almost 4 a.m. Scrambling, I arrived home to find the locks changed. On the door knob was a note: “Go live with your boyfriend, you slut. See if he cooks and cleans up after you. I’ll help you move out your stuff in the morning. - Mom” FML
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Top comments
LeeRed 15
You should've told her that if it wasn't for fornication, she wouldn't be here right now.
thejewishfuhrer 17
Should've replied with: "Then why do you have a son?" and walked out of there with your head held up high. Course, you probably wouldn't be allowed back in after a stunt like that.
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Comments (117)
perdix 31
Get the **** out, because in her religion, she's right. Her house, her rules. Your alternatives are: 1. Quit fornicating (just kidding.) 2. Get a boyfriend who's not a Mama's Boy. 3. Fornicate at your place, in a hotel, or in a car. 4. Convert his mom to a religion that blesses fornication (let me know if you find one.) 5. Get a boyfriend with his own place that has locks.
XcuzimsotiredX 25
religion that blesses fornication, Wicca.
StEpHiE1226 12
Oh wow get your scarlet letter sweater out op
MP78_fml 7
Scarlett letter=adultery... Hawthorne teaches us since Mr. Dimmesdale fornicated with a married woman, that it's okay! :p
Myo_fml 20
I think she's confusing fornication with mastication.
CharresBarkrey 16
Eating is not a sin.
BlueMoonCafe 12
I fail to see how chewing is sinful?
mackischillin 5
You aren't funny
Donovan_757 8
So are a lot of other things. If people stop fornicating you still get people who sin a lot, so eliminating fornication doesn't eliminate it all. Somehow, someway we will always be sinners.
bubba142 5
I agree your life sucks.
TellMeWhatsDeath 14
You know there's a button for that, right?
onorexveritas 24
she sounds lovely
sereoramos 3
What is fornication?
Quikraptor 8
The act of sex outside marriage, my friend.
fyrfyter 4
Other than Bad Santa, I think this is the first time I have ever heard someone use the word fornication!
shoeshoe 7
It sucks being a sad little virgin. Trust me, I know all too well.
CharresBarkrey 16
Two extra ******* letters! Are you kidding me?!
GhostChickens 17
That's when you yell, "SO IS THAT OUTFIT!" and snap your fingers. Seriously though, that woman sounds terrifying.