Today, my boss told me that my attitude to work is awesome and that he'd follow my example of coming in half-an-hour early every day from now on. I relish those 30 minutes as the only time I can get work done without him constantly interrupting me. So much for that. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss yelled at me for leaving on time. After months of management hounding us about our overtime, I get in trouble for doing what I was supposed to do. FML
Today, my boss at my new job yelled at me for being 15 minutes early to work. Last week he yelled at me for being late for my shift when I arrived 5 minutes early. He's considering this my final warning before I'm fired. FML
Today, like every day, my coworker showed up thirty minutes late, sat down for thirty more checking email while I got the morning work done alone, listening to her bitch about how much she hates her job and wants to go home. My coworkers criticized me for being moody, and praised her for being the best. FML
Today, I was scolded by my boss, all because I can finish most tasks in a quarter of the time it takes him, and he doesn't want to be shown up. FML
Today, I accidentally stumbled on a method of getting my job done in about a third of the time, so my boss made it mandatory for all employees. Unfortunately, my coworkers now can't slack off pretending jobs take 2-3 hours, and their constant petty revenge bullying is driving me mad. FML
Today, my boss reprimanded me for not finishing my work on time. Yesterday, she cut an hour from my schedule every day until further notice. FML
Today, marks a whole month that my boss has asked me to come in early to my part-time job, which makes me pretty happy to get the extra hours. I casually made a joke that she might as well make me full-time now. That made her change her mind, now I'm back down to 23 hours a week. FML
Today, I decided to show up early for work and really try to get off my manager's shit-list. On my way to work, my manager called to bitch me out for already being 30 minutes late. Yeah, I forgot about Daylight Savings Time. FML
Today, 30 minutes before I was supposed to quit work at 6pm, my boss showed up. After telling him how the day went, he asked why I was still there. Apparently, for the holiday, we close early. 4 hours earlier. FML
Today, I had my half-year performance review. My boss arrived 15 minutes late, paid basically no attention to my presentation, and left 30 minutes early. I guess I’ll go fuck myself then. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Sounds like the only thing left to do is stay 30 minutes late. Then when he starts staying late too, come in on Saturday. Then when he starts coming in Saturday... You know what, just move into your office. That's your only choice.
Welshite 40
Come in thirty minutes earlier. Then when he follows that example you can change your schedule again. It will become a game!
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Comments (78)
skyeyez9 25
Put on a pair of headphones when you are in early. You dont have to have any music on, but use it to pretend you cant hear him while working. People generally leave you alone if they think you're listening to music.
Jemm_fml 29
No good deeds go unpunished!
FrankHotpants 31
If you relish that time so much then maybe mustard up the courage and tell him to stop bothering you so you can ketchup on your work. *jumps behind bush*
TwistedCherub1 15
I can't help myself... It's "muster", not "mustard". It's almost impossible to correct someone without sounding mean, but please don't take it that way. We all have words or phrases we've perceived inaccurately all our lives. I used to get "sneaky suspicions" instead of "sinking" ones. My husband teased me for a while about that one.
skyeyez9 25
47....thank you! Lol
TwistedCherub1 15
Wow. Just read it again. Blonde moment or bad joke. Maybe a bit of both. FML
FrankHotpants 31
Yeah, that was suppose to be a joke which apparently failed. Relish, ketchup, mustard...get it, haha..no, ok.
Not_Impressed13 9
Got it, but didn't see how it was relevant to the FML..
Futacy 30
Stay 30 minutes overtime.
jmcr 27
Ignoring also works pretend youre too busy to notice him my boss is just loves to breath down his employees necks and so we get nervous and them make mistakes hed steal the phones or talk to the phone girls at the same time while they are talking to the customers its sooo annoying
Croquis_fml 14
Honestly OP it sounds like he's coming in early just TO interrupt you. He probably likes you in the "like-like" fashion.
dark_angel4121 12
Sorry about that OP. But consider this at least your boss like your attitude and it seems you're on his/her good side.
erndogdizzle 4
ha well if I were u I would've been honest am told him the truth so in the long run there's no problems ya know he should respect and understand.
KimmyCupZ 21
Great minds :)
Rohit281 13
It's obvious that he's stalking you. Be careful.