Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after telling my boss that trailing a hand up someone's leg and leering at them constantly is counted as sexual harassment, I got called an "unappreciative little whiny bitch." FML
Today, a female coworker kissed me so I reported it to my boss, but he told me I should take the compliment, and asked me why the hell I was complaining about "getting some." I’m a guy, but I’m sure if I was a woman and I’d had a kiss forced on me, it would be a huge issue. FML
Today, I asked one of the girls at work out on a date. She responded by filing a harassment complaint. Now, I can't speak to her at all without being written up. FML
Today, I had to give a sexual harassment seminar to my department. Someone put in a complaint that my example made them feel uncomfortable. FML
Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML
Today, I told one of my coworkers that she looked really cute today. Later she sent an email to me and cc'd the entire office saying, "It really makes me feel uncomfortable when you say things like that to me. And I shouldn't have to feel that way at work." FML
Today, the coworker I like reported me to HR for "sexual harassment." All I did was make him lunch every day, give him 'just because' gifts, and compliment him in a non-sexual way. It sure isn't "sexual harassment" when another coworker of ours does the exact same things; in fact, he praises it and acts indifferent to me. FML
Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML
Today, a coworker grabbed my ass for the third time. I went to my boss to complain about the sexual harassment. He told me to suck it up and enjoy the attention, and that it was my fault for having a huge, round ass. I think it's time for a new job. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
niftyismybitch 21
Were you ogling her toe cleavage?
micha090 21
What a bitch she is. But if your boss is going to buy her story, i can confidently say that he is an idiot OP.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (104)
blueknight1st 26
If she's a bitch why were you talking to her?
Gho5tk3y 17
Were you trying to use the "Nice shoes, wanna ****?" pickup line? Lol But seriously that's really screwed up I hope your boss laughed in her face when she went to file the report.
1dvs_bstd 41
Shoulda asked her how much she bought it from walmart.
zelda1975 14
"Those are nice shoes...they'd look great under my bed."
smokecloud_ 37
they'd sound better clicking together behind his head. ;)
JMichael 26
Your co-worker is a bitch. Say "good morning" to someone these days and they can sue you for harassment. SMH.
JMichael 26
38- I think those are still in.
Ziggy122 15
"Eyes up HERE, pal!"
buckdharma 38
Hey op, These boots were made for walking, and that's just what they' ll do And one of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you
Enslaved 38
Hmmm Wondering if it was Simpson or Sinatra's version that was playing in your head?
jayray313 21
Did you compliment her by licking her feet or something?
jrock9093 18
What a b****