Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after telling my boss that trailing a hand up someone's leg and leering at them constantly is counted as sexual harassment, I got called an "unappreciative little whiny bitch." FML
Today, a female coworker kissed me so I reported it to my boss, but he told me I should take the compliment, and asked me why the hell I was complaining about "getting some." I’m a guy, but I’m sure if I was a woman and I’d had a kiss forced on me, it would be a huge issue. FML
Today, I asked one of the girls at work out on a date. She responded by filing a harassment complaint. Now, I can't speak to her at all without being written up. FML
Today, I had to give a sexual harassment seminar to my department. Someone put in a complaint that my example made them feel uncomfortable. FML
Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML
Today, I told one of my coworkers that she looked really cute today. Later she sent an email to me and cc'd the entire office saying, "It really makes me feel uncomfortable when you say things like that to me. And I shouldn't have to feel that way at work." FML
Today, the coworker I like reported me to HR for "sexual harassment." All I did was make him lunch every day, give him 'just because' gifts, and compliment him in a non-sexual way. It sure isn't "sexual harassment" when another coworker of ours does the exact same things; in fact, he praises it and acts indifferent to me. FML
Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML
Today, a coworker grabbed my ass for the third time. I went to my boss to complain about the sexual harassment. He told me to suck it up and enjoy the attention, and that it was my fault for having a huge, round ass. I think it's time for a new job. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
niftyismybitch 21
Were you ogling her toe cleavage?
micha090 21
What a bitch she is. But if your boss is going to buy her story, i can confidently say that he is an idiot OP.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (104)
emmmmmmii26 11
What a lovely lady -__-
Ksweety_fml 27
Yeah, she is such a bitch.!! Smh...
ThaPrelude 11
Bitchy co workers be bitchy
MyNameIsNot 15
bitch be shoozy
Mimi12589_fml 10
Geez! You americans are so sensitive about sexual harassment.. Never come work in France we kinda like joking about sex .. Especially at work !
gracehi 33
This is an extreme example of someone misinterpreting an innocent compliment. We expect people to respect one another, and not objectify each other, especially in the work place. So no, "we Americans" don't tolerate people like the Frenchman who propositioned my mother in the crudest way possible while she was minding her own business eating a popsicle while sitting on a park bench in Paris. Based on that, I assume that all you French people must be perverts with no social skills. Oh wait. Am I generalizing an entire country's population based on the actions of one asshole? My bad.
QueenSaru 28
I hope OP's co-worker never comes to my work. There's sex talk, joking, ass-slapping. XD Of course, with the exception of about six men, the other forty or so is all women, so maybe there's a higher level of comfort with each other?
Mimi12589_fml 10
Wow... Patriotic much ?? Well sorry for generalizing on people of your precious nation.. Guess you don't take humor very well either..
gracehi 33
Actually, 43, I am a great lover of comedy. And while I noticed your attempt at humor, I simply felt you fell short of your goal. And with my comment, I simply meant to point out that one could just as easily make the opposite generalization about your country. However, to a certain extent you are correct that Americans tend to take sexual harassment very seriously, and have a very broad definition of sexual harassment. Complimenting someone's shoes, however, does not fall beneath that very wide umbrella. If OP's boss has any sense, he'll talk to this woman about being overly sensitive once he gets OP's side of the story. Now when it comes to sexual jokes in the workplace, that is acceptable in America as well, so long as all parties consent. If one person expresses offense or discomfort, then the joking should stop, and as long as it does, there's no sexual harassment issue. However, very rarely does anyone actually take issue with sexual jokes. So, just so you know, we're not all neurotic prudes, just as I'm sure most French people aren't nymphomaniacs. I mean, if that were true about France, American tourism would likely be much better there, and have a far lower percentage of snooty art lovers and fine dining connoissers.
Rainhawk94 27
No one like frenchies who don't shave anyways
perdix 31
"Your heels are nice. Why don't you bend over so I can show you my pumps."
LanceGoodthrust 19
Maybe she sexualizes shoes, herself, and was projecting. I know a guy who thought that everyone who liked his car was sexually attracted to him (which really worried me about what he does with his car when nobody is around).
Enslaved 38
Mechanophilia? The things one can learn from watching "1,000 Ways to Die". :P
starile 20
D: Oh my goodness!
perdix 31
#10, you mean, now that I've finally taken to them, Crocs are out of style? Please tell me lower-back tattoos are still cool -- I got a great deal in one last week!
Fmlsea 28
sounds like she's just looking for attention .
jayellef 3
Wait, did you actually get in trouble for something so dumb?