N
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my best friend told me she wanted to rape my throat. I did not know that was possible. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Alexa, play "Asleep" by The Smiths
Today, I woke up to my best friend laying next to me vigorously touching herself. She thought I was asleep. FML
Anonymous
Athens, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML
Anonymous
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Betrayal!
Today, my best friend of 10 years told me she had slept with a man who had a girlfriend. I told her that it wasn't that bad. She then informed me that it was my boyfriend. FML
why
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I listened to my best friend describe having sex with her boyfriend in explicit detail. This would have been fine, but her boyfriend is my little brother. FML
anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Sing me to sleep…
Today, my best friend informed me that he had lost his virginity to my sister, which I already knew. However, he told me the location. My room. While I was asleep. FML
seriously?
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
There's always that one friend…
Today, my best friend actually had the audacity to try and one-up my suicide attempt story. FML
Anonymous
Portland, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML
Really jealous
India 🌶️ Spicy
Creeped out
Today, my best friend confided in me that she's going to have sex with her cousin. Shocked, I tried to convince her not to and how it's a horrible idea. She called me a jealous bastard who can't get laid. FML
anon
La Puente, United States
Awkward conversation
Today, I had to have a very difficult and awkward conversation with my best friend about her fiancé hitting on me. She seemed completely unfazed and ended up admitting that a three-way with me was actually her idea, but she didn't want to "weird me out" by asking me about it. FML
Noname
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Kinky
Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub when she started to breathe heavily. I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck. She then turned around and said, "Tell my roommate I'm having an asthma attack." FML
Top comments
katieatieay 0
you were sorely mistaken.
Roi_fml 0
... lulwut?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (67)
Roi_fml 0
... lulwut?
ThatsSOBforshort 2
surprise throatsecks!!!!
Alvarortor 14
*quagmire voice* it is, op, it is
katieatieay 0
you were sorely mistaken.
iranoutofnames 6
emphasis on the "sore" :)
NorfolkDude 2
Dude, she didn't mean that in a bad way. Think French kiss. At least I hope so. If "she" is really a "he" you might want to take a self defense class and wear a metal mask at nights.
greatbelow 0
Or she'd get a strap on and **** your throat with a big, black ****. That would work.
Clozzie 0
Haha
sensual_kidney 0
lmao @ #18 That isn't a bad thing. That means she's crazy horny and you should just tap that before it gets away. Unless you know she's crazy, then you should probably keep a hand gun with you cause she might literally rape you in the throat.
katieatieay 0
um #20, i really don't see what difference it makes whether it's a male or a female. no one wants to get their throat raped, because if they did, it wouldn't be throat RAPE. and being throat raped would do an equal amount of damage to a man as it would to a woman. although i don't exactly know how a woman would manage to rape someone's throat, i'm sure there are ways.
katieatieay 0
woops, read it wrong. silly me.
ChaosChild 0
XD what? I hope she wasn't serious. Unless you wanted her to be I suppose.
genericnickname 0
It's called a Cincinnati Bowtie and you'd first need to get a trachiotomy - and she'd need to get a strap-on.
Guiseppi 0
Erm...