Today, it's my birthday. What did I get? A 12-hour work shift, after spending an almost sleepless night in a computer chair because my bed is infested with bed bugs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it’s my birthday. My boss treated me to a day off work, except my mother called at 12:01am drunk as hell screaming, “Happy birthday” down the phone. When I finally fell back asleep, I awoke to my boss asking me to come in after all. FML
Today, after being moved to three different employer-provided apartments because they all had mold and electrical problems, I requested a bigger bed. The bed they delivered had bedbugs. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I spent the day doing nothing but chores, amongst which baking my own birthday cake. I was then so exhausted that I couldn't even stand my own company, so I ate the cake alone on the couch, watching TV. It didn’t taste great. FML
Today, it's my birthday. So far I have received: the news that my parents are divorcing, a dead bird and a pile of shit left on my bed (courtesy of the cat), a rash all over my face, and some slippers from my boyfriend. FML
Today, I woke up to an unexpected surprise for my birthday. It wasn't cake, nor ice cream. It was hundreds of baby spiders crawling all over me. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML
Today, it was my birthday. I spent a pleasant day with one of my best friends, then I spent four hours in the emergency room because my husband broke his foot while working. We're both self-employed, so production is going to fall 6 weeks behind. FML
Today, three days after finally having a bed to sleep on, I woke up with multiple bedbug bites. I can't use my blankets, wear any of my clothes and it's back to sleeping on the floor for me. FML
Today, I worked a short shift at work, getting sent home early because it was slow. In the time I was gone, my family decided surprise me by rearranging my room and put in my new desk. They also surprised me when I learned that they'd spilled a slushie on my very expensive computer. FML
Today, it was my birthday. Normally, the little office I work in throws a big party for every employee on their special day, but nothing was done for me, not even a "Happy Birthday" came my way. I didn't want to be rude, so I stayed silent. They didn't do anything because I was getting laid off. FML
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Top comments
ChopSuey444 20
Happy birthday, anyway, OP!
MrConcise 35
Can I just spill your glass of water so it's empty instead of half full?
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Comments (61)
One_Way 43
Why did you not request the day off from work?
GhostFox 34
They very well could have and been denied. Or maybe they needed the hours. It could even be that their boss is the sort of person who fires you for even asking.
blackhawksgirl 2
Hey if you need any advice on bedbugs .. Been there done that it really sucks and it's hard but you can get rid of them ... Remember no spray or exterminator can kill eggs only kills the live ones ... only heat will kill the eggs ... 100 degrees or 8 hrs or 130 for one ... Good luck!!!
blackhawksgirl 2
Btw..... happy birthday
Quasars 10
Merry Birthday
imbedderdenu 23
Happy Birthday. Many more will suck. But there will also be some amazing ones to make up for those I'm sure :). Chin up OP
LVtaytay 12
It's definitely one you'll never forget, but not in the way you'd would want to be. Anyways happy birthday OP
MERICAN_REDNECK 10
It was my birthday on the 10th as well! Hey I got a pair of shorts from my mom and a few bday cards from family, don't worry treat yourself for the weekend!
sirhavok747 4
Probably would be bette off sleeping on the floor.
ftloosenfanzfree 7
Tell them you have bedbugs and I bet they'll send you home.
emchocolat_fml 25
It was my birthday on the 10th as well... 30 years old ^^. I got: _leaving my flat in the morning, handing over keys and doing a check-round with the estate agent to make sure everything was OK _going round electricity, water and insurance companies to cut it all off, then back to the estate agency to give them proof of all this _travelling to the other side of the country, near the airport, in order to take the plane the next day to leave the current country forever ...and all of this with two howling cats! Happy belated birthday!