Today, it finally became clear to me that before you start dating a co-worker, it's best to figure out who they've already dated from work, just in case one of her exes is your new manager. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend, who I thought was finally out of my life for good, is now dating my new manager. FML
Today, I found out that the co-worker I have been dating and falling for is the same co-worker that had been spreading rumors about me and getting me in trouble with my boss. FML
Today, I found out my ex is applying for a job at my current company. She may become my boss. FML
Today, my coworker began flirting with the new guy at work and accepted a date with him. I’ve been trying to get with her for months and she'd told me, “Sorry, I don’t fraternize with colleagues.” I called her out on it and she told me, “OK, I’ll spell it out for you: I do fraternize with attractive colleagues.” FML
Today, the girl I work with, who I’ve developed feelings for, started dating another guy at work. She’d told me that she “doesn’t believe” in dating coworkers and she doesn’t “shit where she eats.” FML
Today, I found out that a girl who I really liked at work, who is my manager and with whom I'm friends, and who knows I like her, has been secretly dating someone else who works there for a month, and everyone at work knew except me, because she didn't want to tell me. FML
Today, my colleagues have been trying to play matchmaker between myself and the new girl at the office. I'll admit we share more similarities than differences from what I've learned so far, but I know something my colleagues don't: she's actively pursuing a guy through online dating. FML
Today, I found out my boss hired literally the only person in this town who is an ex-boyfriend. I also work with my current boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out that after working in the same office for five years, I now work with three of my husband's ex-girlfriends. FML
Today, I found out that the coworker I’d been crushing on told me he was gay so I wouldn’t hit on him anymore. Turns out he did that so he could focus on wooing a female coworker of mine. They’re now dating. FML
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Top comments
flirtyfaery 7
Or you just don't date co-workers at all.
sweet2u22 9
Dating coworkers is against a lot of company's policies for a reason.
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Comments (113)
ivanhoe4u 3
Don't eat where you s***.
ikickgingers 15
Shit* Fify
ThatLooksSticky 16
I don't shit at work. I hold it in until I get home.
Avalanches 9
You're ******, my friend!
LookMomICanFly 4
I thought one of the general rules of the office was you don't date co- workers.
waycool 10
if =/= it
musicmaniac0099 0
Keep it secretive from him.
kickboxingchick 5
That's a terrible idea . Then it'd be even worse then if he found out by the OP just telling him .
astralvagan 20
Usually when you date a ****, there won't be any secrets as to who she had slept with because she's already talking to the next guy about you and how good/bad you were
hero93 6
trying to be nice here.. but your new girlfriend sounds like the office hoe. sorry. maybe try the business down the street ?
AdrianEC 15
There goes that promotion, and after all that butt-kissing you did to the old manager too. Seriously though, FYL.
afulks78 11
Awkward...
heyred 11
Don't shit where you eat.
Ray_of_midnight 23
Or, more politely, don't get your meat where you get your bread. Dating coworkers is almost always a bad idea. It's a recipe for drama at best, and a recipe for termination and a sexual harassment lawsuit at worst. Dating cow orkers is even worse. Never date anyone who orks cows.
perdix 31
I was thinking that, too. I've heard that phrase for years and it always has struck me as odd? Who equates sex with defecation? I looked in Bartlett's Quotations and found it attributed to Manuel "Dirty" Sanchez. That explains it.
Ray_of_midnight 23
Must've been invented while aboard a steamer headed to Cleveland.
nathanc3433 7
Ouch. Time to start sucking up