Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML
Today, my 5-year-old told me that she'd learnt about gravity, then asked, “So when you fall down, is it because the Earth punched you?” I said yes, along with a giggle. Later at the supermarket, she tripped and screamed, “THE EARTH HIT ME AGAIN!” I was then reminded of high school when it felt like everyone was staring at me. FML
Today, I was messing around in computer class when somebody called my name from the hall. Trying to be smooth, I tried rolling my chair backwards out into the hall. The wheels wasted no time jamming and sending me crashing face-first into the floor in front of everyone. FML
Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
Today, I was explaining a complex work issue to my team. I moved my chair back so I could see them all. The leg of my chair went into a hole in the floor, causing it to fall over and me with it. I tried to finish explaining but everyone was laughing so hard they couldn't hear. Then they realized I couldn't get up. FML
Today, in class my friend played a joke on me by pulling my seat from under me while i was about to sit. I fell and everybody laughed at me. During the next class, I did the same thing to him. He broke his arm. He was the star of the basketball team. Nobody laughed. FML
Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML
Today, in physics class, my teacher was messing around with an air cannon and I accidentally blurted out, "Blow me!" It took me all of 5 seconds to realize why everyone was laughing. FML
Today, I had a substitute for science and I was standing at the stationary table when some other guy came over and made the thing wobble. The whole thing fell over and I got all the blame. Then I was sitting with my friends at lunch but another friend came back right when my crush was gonna sit next to me. FML
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Top comments
plethora 3
Hey, I've seen some lard-arsed kids sitting on desks and they've been fine. It was probably an old desk. Or, if you ARE morbidly obese, sitting at your computer complaining about it won't help.
ballerphilip23 0
gravity is freakin' physics, not math! what the hell is that teacher doin? lol if "gravity" pulled you down so hard the desk broke, let's hope you didnt go all the way to the centre of the earth :D
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Comments (190)
mms013 0
what i want to know is why you have school on a saturday..
RPGod 0
#87 - this could be a story that happened some time ago, or it could have just made it through moderation. Also, some prep schools (like mine Dx ) have saturday class.
Jabulls 0
#7 you FAIL! and also OP, stop being fat and that won't happen.
insane_chick 0
Wow this reminds me of a cross between Shallow Hal and Dead Poets Society. Shallow Hal: The fat chick sits down and breaks the solid steel chair... Dead Poets Society: Robin Williams asks every student to stand on his desk. haha... but really it could of been that the desk was poorly put together and old, or some dick-wad unscrewed the screws to your desk. That's happened at my ghetto ass school before.
Roddsy 0
#15, pur-lease. It's spelt "dying". -sigh- Now, WHO the HELL would spell it "dyng"? Gosh... what's the world coming to ¬¬; I hate it when people try to act smart >.> (your added quotation marks emphasised this too).
Quinklong 0
OBEY GRAVITY! IT'S THE LAW! And why were you learning about gravity in math?
ehroo 1
is this real? I mean, why would you be talking about gravity in math class?
SmexxiHunny 0
lol Well, probably just an old desk..
cefarix 5
OP said: "**** gravity." Uhh, you're joking right? Really, **** gravity? Do you know what would happen without gravity? The Earth's atmosphere would escape into space. So you wouldn't be able to breathe. So you'd die. The Earth would drift off into space far, far from the Sun. Temperatures would plummet to near -270 C (-450 F). So you'd die. In fact, there wouldn't even be an Earth, Sun, our galaxy, or the universe, because these all require gravity to form and function. So you wouldn't even exist. As for me, I love gravity. **** you!
HelloStarshine 0
That was probably a super old desk. I see "larger" kids sitting on desks all the time and it never seems to have that effect. Did you fall? Like... are you alright? I'm also going to guess that maybe you were in Physics instead of Math. I could be wrong though.